My mother......My everything
by pradeen chetty
My name is Pradeen, I will be 32 years old on the 24th May 2012. On the 16th April 2002, my 41 year old mother was shot and killed by a family friend.....he has been on the run and in hiding ever since then.....ten years have passed, to this day, I still do not know why he killed her.....she was at her brother's home when he killed her and since that day, my heart has been broken. My mother touched my life in ways she nor anyone else would ever be able to contemplate.....it's my tenth birthday without my mother......sometimes, people say that it gets easier with time, they obviously do not know what they are talking about...it doesn't get any easier, it gets harder......I have 3 children, and 1 step son, my mother will never get to know them and love them, they will never get to know this woman who was larger than life.....who would love them uncoditionally as she loved me.....I am the only proof that my mother walked thsi earth, I am all that is left of her....cos 5 years after her murder, my 18 year old brother died.....and they just left me alone....my birthday is 2 days away.....I just want to crawl up into a hole and cry my heart out, but being a working mom is difficult, I cant just fall apart when I feel like, so I keep it together, I keep myself together for as long as possible...... i miss her smile, her voice, her no-nonsense-attitude on life and parenting......I miss her so much, it hurts so much and there are days, when I cant keep it together....today is one of those days....one of those weeks, one of those months, where nothing will make me feel better other than the loving arms of my mom!