my mum my best friend

by sharon
(england)

my mum passed away july 11th 2012 from a cervical tumour. she had radiotherapy and chemotherapy and we hoped she would beat this illness. she was a young 77 year old who looked 10 years younger. the cancer cells spread to her pelvis and lymph glands in her neck in october 2011 and she went through another 2 months of chemotherapy, but at xmas she started to deterioate.The next six months was awful as she couldnt walk and was so breathless, and her kidneys were blocked due to the chemo. She was admitted into hospital for rest but we were told that her cancer could not be treated anymore. 2 days later her lungs filled with fluid and we were told she probably had hours to live. i stayed with her through the night feeling so helpless as she was in so much pain and distress and all i could do was hold her hand. she passed away on 11th july 2012 at 1.07pm, and i still cant believe it. She was my best friend and up until her illness she came to work with me as i am a parcel courier, and she loved every minute. I saw her everyday and i miss her so much.I just cry everyday and feel so numb and find it so difficult to cope without having her around I try to take comfort that she is in a better place and is re-united with my dad

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my mum my best friend

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Aug 11, 2012
 eventually it will get better
by: ekr

I stopped at your posting because your mom and my mom both 77, passed on the same day. My mom passed from congestive heart failure. There is no connection other than the shared feeling of grief for a very beloved mom leaving too soon. I am grateful for my mom, but sad at her passing, and miss her every day. I recall the same sorts of feelings occurred at the time my dad died a decade ago, but slowly over time it seemed to receed. I extend heartfelt condolences on your loss and wish you well.
Aug 01, 2012
 my mum my best friend
by: Doreen U.K.

Sharon I am so sorry for your loss of your mum. It is so very hard to watch someone you love die slowly before your eyes. You feel panic inside and can do nothing to save that person. I nursed my husband for 3yrs.39days. It was a slow painful death and my Steve wanted to die earlier because he had a deadly cancer caused by asbestos. I can't bear to think what he went through and it does affect my grief. I used to scream down the phone for a doctor to get here to give Steve an injection for the pain and they had to wait till clinic ended. I am in England and so are you. Can you believe what is happening to our health Service due to lack of funding. Sometimes it is hard to get the cancer drug you need. Sometimes you are denied Chemo or Radiotherapy. It is just 11 weeks I lost Steve so everything is still raw for me to grieve. Steve was only 65yrs. He died 16 days before his 66th birthday. If Steve had been able to enjoy some retirement I wouldn't have felt so bad if he reached his 70's. I feel so cheated from enjoying a retirement life. Now every day is empty and lonely. Even one day at a time is HELL for me to go through. Suddenly it is as if the 44yrs. of marriage didn't exist. Steve was working all of 47yrs. since I had known him. The working hours of a man's life is ridiculous so is the retirement age. There is nothing else for us but to go through this grief and wait till it is ended and we feel less pain I guess. You had a good relationship with your mother. You spent so much time with her and this has got to be a plus for you. But the loss will feel that much greater because of it. I hope that you have supportive people around you so that you can have an easier grief as it does help to be supported well.
Aug 01, 2012
 Joy will come!
by: Anonymous

One day you will smile and mean it. I lost my mom on July 3, 2012 and it hurts so much. It hurts so much. There is pain but I believe "weeping may endure for a night (it may be a many nights) but Joy comes in the morning.

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