my petite annick died of fighting cancer for 3,5 YEARS at 73 years old,

by paul
(montreal quebec canada)

she was my raison detre my life my lover my friend, in the last three years she went through 65 chemo treatments to be with me and hope to see me reach my goals.....with no luck because of the downturn in the economy. --- i,ve fail her i'm mad at myself for keeping this going for to long --- i hate myself,i wish that i've died with her, i'm mad at her for leaving me behind it is not fare. i was with her at every treatment every test every examinations i help her giving medications follow up,and 200 needles of aranep and neupogen for red cells and white cells --- and arrive to death it's not fair......paul

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Mar 26, 2013
Annick "God I miss you"
by: Paul

ON THE 29TH OF MARCH 2013 AT 3:50 AM IT WILL BE 18 MONTHS SINCE YOU HAVE PASSED AWAY ---- IT STILL SEEM LIKE YESTERDAY....I MISS YOU TERRIBLY I HAVE BEEN SICK PHYSICALLY AND MENTALLY AND WISH THIS LIFE WOULD COME TO AN END.....OUR GRAND KIDS ARE THE ONLY ONE MISSING BOTH OF US....AS FOR THE REST OF THE FAMILY THEY DON'T WANT TO BE REMINDED ALSO GLAD THAT I LIVE 30000 MILES AWAY FROM THEM. I THINK THE BEST THING THAT I COULD DO IS FIND A SOLUTION TO JOIN YOU AS SOON AS POSSIBLE HOPE I HAVE THE GUTS TO PUT AND END TO THIS HELL THAT I AM IN......LOVING YOU FOR EVER "TON CHERIE".......

Nov 27, 2011
MY PETITE ANNICK
by: CHERI

IT'S BEEN FOUR MONTHS SINCE YOU HAVE PASS AWAY. I CAN'T LIVE WITHOUT YOU ---- PLEASE COME AND GET ME, I'M THINKING ABOUT LEAVING THIS WORLD A LOT..... MAY BE SUICIDE IS THE ANSWER!------ CHERI

Nov 11, 2011
Ma Petite Annick
by: Paul

DEAR ANNICK,106 DAYS AGO---IN TEARS WE SAW YOU SINKING FROM CANCER,AS WE WATCH YOU FADE AWAY-----OUR HEARTS WERE BREAKING WHEN YOU COULD NOT FIGHT TO STAY----WE COULD NOT WISH YOU BACK, TO SUFFER MORE AGAIN----MAY GOD KEEPS HIS ARMS AROUND YOU AND GIVE YOU SPECIAL CARE--------------------- DEAR GOD, IF ROSES AND MUGETS GROW IN HEAVEN PLEASE PICK A BUNCH ,AND TELL HER IT'S FROM US---THAT WE LOVE HER,WE MISS HER VERY MUCH AND IN OUR HEARTS SHE WILL NEVER GO AWAY----TO OUR LOVELY ANNICK-----TILL WE MEET AGAIN......I MISS YOU TERRIBLY PAUL,,,COME AND GET ME.....

Nov 01, 2011
MY petite Annick
by: Paul

It's been 96 days since you passed away how I wish I had left with you, died at the same time without you this world is useless.I can't wish you back since you were so sick....with cancer eating you up with pain...I have join a companions through grief hospice who have had similar death of love one. I walk with them every Saturday morning we talk and listen to each other, very difficult to hide the pain of broken hearth's....I've found that during the day I can walk, talk and joke with those around me. But I wear a painted smile with the darkness of my mind....I wish you can come and get me or help me to go through this....wishing we were together again.....Love you.

Oct 16, 2011
My petite Annick
by: Paul

AH!.....Sweety pie I love you and wish I was with you...I'm having trouble getting my life together nothing seems to interest me anymore....this world is not important anymore without you....please come an get me....Paul

Sep 22, 2011
my petite annick
by: paul

What I know is death does not destroy love that we have for those who are no longer here...I know it because, every day, I live them with us...I am trying to live on in your eyes, your mind and your acts of kindness...Till we meet again....Paul

Sep 17, 2011
MY PETITE ANNICK
by: Anonymous

Dear Annick, I'm asking you how do I go about living without you --- I'm missing you so terribly --- sweaty pie help me it's been 51 days since you passed away ---- I'm bringing your hashes with me in 10 days to Nanaimo on Vancouver island but I'm an emotional wreck,you have to give me the answer how to continue......Paul I keep crying all the time --- I wish I could be with you all the time...

Sep 11, 2011
life and death how unfair...
by: Anonymous

Paul,

Death is not fair, Nor is life. That is not a smack in the face as you hurt, as the pain that you feel seems over whelming unimaginably horrific.

I too recall being Hubbys caretakere. Thinking that the 2nd year into his illness I could see progress, I could see a former part of who my husband was then BAM! My life was stolen away from me as I knew it. I will try not to say all the things that are supposed to bring you comfort, for now there is nothing I can say that would ease your weary mind.

Just know that we are here and we do hear you. Come here often and read of others pain and know that you are not alone....Never are you alone because we really do understand what it is like to have your life pulled out from under you.
One step one breath...
HH

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