My "pop" was amazing! His battle with cancer was short.

by Becca
(Mississippi)

I'm 18 years old and a daddy's little girl. I was raised around my grandparents day and night. As I got older I moved in with my mom and didn't see them as much. My uncle died in October 27,2010 and that's the last time I saw my grandparents. I know I'm horrible for not going to see them but they live so far away. My dad called me August 16. 2012 and Said my grandpa "pop" was in the hospital not doing good. He was a man who never complained. Had had worked the week before he went to the hospital. He went in that Monday before I was called. So he was only there 5 days before they told us he has skelatorial cancer and it was all over his body. He had just a little while to live. He passed the following Sunday August 19, 2012. We just buried him today and it was very hard! I miss him like crazy I know he is watching me and he is no longer suffering. He is with his babies now though. He has four kids but only one is still alive and he is my dad. My two uncles passed in 1998 and 2012. My aunt passed when she was 2 years old in 1972. He is in a better place now but I still don't k ow how to except the fact that he is gone. I am still young and wanted him to see his grand kids (once I had some) I didn't know that he would pass so soon. I thought he was invincible. He was a brave strong 5'3" man! He was my hero! I love him more than anything! I am just not sure on how to grieve and come to the fact that it really happened. It's like reality hasn't set completely in. I am very upset that if anything happens like if something isn't done right or if a fly is killed I just boohoo and need someone to hold me. I need advice!

Becca!

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Aug 25, 2012
My "pop" was amazing! His battle with cancer was short
by: Doreen U.K.

Becca I am sorry for your loss of your pop. You are still very young and only 18yrs. You have had so many losses and perhaps not had time to grieve each loss so it has all come together. There is no right and wrong way to grieve. You are in shock now after the funeral and it takes us all different times to process and deal with our loss. It doesn't feel real. It has been almost 4 months for me losing my husband from cancer, and I still wake up and feel in a panic. Saying to myself "Did this really happen" We all go through this as it is a part of grief. If you don't know how to grieve this is what happens. First you may feel numb. sometimes your feelings will be as if they were frozen. You will then start to thaw out and perhaps feel ANGER. GUILT
SADNESS. SORROW. HEART PAIN. FEAR. PANIC. A lot of CRYING. SEARCHING for our loved one lost. These are the stages of Grief. It won't happen all at once. But in stages at different times. Your Pop lived far away and so you didn't get to see him much. this is part of Life. You will recover from this guilt. My cousins live not far from me and I didn't see them for 40yrs. SHAME ON ME. But we all just led such busy lives. We are in contact now. We don't feel any different. No anger. No guilt. It is as if we never lost contact. There is an acceptance. This makes a difference. ACCEPTING WHAT WE CANNOT CHANGE.

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