My precious daughter

by Debra
(Bristol Wisconsin)

We lost our 18 year old daughter to ovarian cancer in August of 2013. She was diagnosed just a year earlier. It was a very rare form and it progressed so fast. We took her to the best doctors in Milwaukee, Chicago, Texas and Mayo in Minnesota. Through multiply surgeries and chemo she was still able to play golf her senior year of High School and graduate. She was accepted at the state college and was going to play on the college golf team. She was our only daughter. Our pride. My Angel, her fathers light. It hurts so much. She should be here with us. She should be with her friends, finishing her first year of college. So much she needed to do. So much she deserved to do. Why? Why? Why? Now we just go through motions of another day. No meaning, no smiling, no laughing. How do we live a life without her.

Comments for My precious daughter

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Jul 11, 2014
Sorry for your loss
by: Anonymous

At least she had two loving parents with her at the end. I know this seems so unfair! It just seems like the last thing you'd have to worry about at age 17 is dying. It is scary to feel so vulnerable and that there is no reason. I know you'll feel better eventually. Things will never be the same, but, your life will adjust, slowly.

Jun 07, 2014
My precious daughter
by: Doreen UK

Debra I am so sorry for your loss of your precious young daughter. I was shocked. I didn't know anyone as young as your daughter at 17yrs. could lose her life to what I thought was an older adult disease. She was much too young to not have a life to live and do all the things young girls like to do. Shopping, boyfriends, marriage, children, etc. Just the simple usual things in life that make life fun, exciting and meaningful.
Having lost my husband to a deadly cancer 2yrs ago I can understand that life has no meaning now. The people in our life are who give our life meaning, value, and purpose. Caring, sharing, loving are all the attributes that make life good. Gone. Never to get back.
Having to re-structure your life without your daughter will be the most difficult thing you have ever had to do. Carrying her for 9 months. Rearing her from childhood to teens, on to young adulthood. Then to lose her is the worst cruelty to happen. So very crushing. Every waking day is the same and it hurts as the universe claims another young life. Every parent who still has their child will feel so vulnerable and exposed to what can happen despite one's age. death has been reversed and claiming lives younger each day. If I didn't have God holding me up I couldn't go on each day. Don't even know how many times we will visit the haunts of losing loved one's again. All we can ask is that God can Lead us all on from day to day when we have no strength to go on in life. May God Comfort you and your family in the loss of your daughter, and grant you the Peace you need to go on each day with such a broken heart.

Jun 06, 2014
There are no words...
by: Lynne Darling

...that I can add to what the other parents here have said. We lost our youngest daughter in February 2012. She had just turned 30.
I can be distracted for longer periods of time now and we have other children but the "me" that other people see, co-workers...even family, isn't really me at all. It's a well polished facade. I even try to believe that it's real sometimes.
The real me is so sad and so fatalistic.
I know that my Jessica and your precious daughter would never want us to suffer so, but we truly can't help it.
Hold the light that was your love for each other tight. It will help you go on. I am so terribly sorry for for your loss.

Jun 06, 2014
Your precious daughter
by: Michelle

I read my comment then I read sosaddad and I am ashamed. I appear as if I walk around consumed by hate unable to function. I know there is no magic wand or even words if that makes any sense at all.
Our daughter was Huge into fitness. She had signed up for her second half marathon, may 2013. I looked at my husband the day after she died and told him I would run her marathon for her and off we went, my husband at my side. we are not runners... I was in tears by the end but finish I did. I'd done it with a broken leg because I ran it for Megan because she could not.
Before the marathon in may we participated in the chilly cheeks 5 miler as they dedicated that event that day to her as she came in first in the the female division the year before and could not figure out why she had not signed up for the 2013 race. The facilitator of the event actually went online and found she had been hit by a truck on her morning run January 8th.. We ran that race for her January 19th 2013 and again 2014.
Tomorrow I am off for a 150 mile bike ride for MS. Yes, Megan biked this one also in 2012.
so for me now, I do what I do for Megan. She was my world so for me to push on, it's all for her.
You will live if nothing more, for your daughter.
I am so very sorry.....

Jun 05, 2014
God bless you
by: SoSadDad

Debra (and your husband), my sincere wish is that you did not have to endure the pain, lonliness, frustration, helplessness and hopelessness that is losing a child. And especially your only child. My wife and I are also childless now, having lost Mel at 31 in September, 2009 and Jenn at 28 in July, 2011. The pain and grief seems unbearable, and sometimes we wonder what there is left to live for. Neither of us has considered suicide. But we are not afraid of death, and our belief says that we will see them again. We asked why over and over, and even now sometimes we ask. But the truth is that there is no answer that would satisfy us, or "justify" the loss. I must say to you, and especially your husband (we men tend to try to be tough and manly), let yourselves grieve. I heard a song as I got to work this morning, sitting in my car. She started out by saying "This is for you, Daddy." I couldn't get out of the car for 15 minutes. You just can't get around the fact that it hurts, and likely always will. We're not the same people we were. And you have probably noticed that others who, thankfully, have not lost a child or grandchild just cannot understand who we are now and how we feel. It's not their fault, and I am thankful for every parent who doesn't understand.
I just wish I could take the pain from you two, but I can't. But believe it or not, there is hope for another day. One day you will smile and laugh, and be the parents your daughter would want you to be, if she could tell you.

God bless you!

Jun 04, 2014
Your precious daughter
by: Michelle

Its been 17 months since we lost our 22 year old daughter Megan. We exist, nothing more. Most days I walk around telling the walls how much I hate my life.
How sorry I am for the loss of your daughter. I don't know how we got here or where to go from here.
Hugs

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