my shattered life
My life fell apart in a year. I lost both my husband and son within 6 months of each other. My husband of 37 years, who was my high school sweetheart, passed away on April 22, 2012 of cancer. He was 55 years old. My son left his job, wife, and 2 sons to come back home to help me care for his dad at our home, as I had promised him I would bring him home to die. My son never left his dad's side for the 2 weeks before he passed. He showed so much compassion and love to his dad and me. When he returned home with his family after the funeral of his dad, I was so lonely. I had been with my husband since we both were 17 years old. I felt like part of me had died with him. my son was so worried about me, and felt guilty for having to leave me, with him and his family living 5 hours away. I tried to reassure him I would be fine; although he knew better. I made a trip to my son and his family's home once a month after my husband left me. unless my son made a trip home. On November 6, 2012 I had a close friend knock on my door at 10:30 p.m. giving my the news that my son had suffered a fatal heart attack. he had been at home after a day at work, playing with his sons (a nightly ritual), when he started having chest pain. His wife rushed him to the E.R., and he was pronounced dead an hour later. He was a picture of health, a federal law enforcement officer. No parent should have to bury a child. He was 33 years old, but to me he was still that baby that I had loved so much and tried to protect, even though he had become my protector. The pain never eases. I will never heal. I feel so bad for his wife and 2 sons. They miss him as much as I do. His wife and sons have moved to the town I live in and my son and husband are buried side by side. I visit them daily. My life will never be the same.