My sister chose her path to end her life

by Mei Inn

I lost my sister a month ago, she's only 35. I witnessed her death right in front of my eyes, where she climbed over the balcony and hanging on the rail, looking at me before she let go. There were some disagreement, talking about family matters and by seeing her climbing over, I thought she just want to challenge or threaten me in a conversation. I left her there, I blamed myself up to today when everyone keep telling me that it is not my fault.

I have read teachings of Buddha, to understand living and death, I have googled all the articles of grief, depression and loss, but till today, it is so hard for me. I miss her greatly and sometimes my heart just ache so much. there are no words to describe my pain. I tried to understand why she chose this path but there will be never an answer to this. She took the truth with her, and we as Living always wonder where we went wrong.

Comments for My sister chose her path to end her life

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Jan 30, 2012
I'm sorry for your loss
by: Anonymous

In my family there have been a number of suicides. The second suicide was my brother John, jumped from my sister's balcony. I had promised myself not to look over the balcony to see the outline of his body. The police have a tendency to do that, what for I don't understand. If I could, I wish I could take you back to hours, minutes and preferably days before that horrible event, but in life there is no take backs. Knowing that she chose her path does that help you in anyway. I was not there when my brother jumped. So I have no where to go with it. My sister says she was in the bathroom when he actually jumped and she said they weren't arguing or anything so it really leaves me with nothing. Was your sister calm. You bring up Budism, was she religious - are you - does it give you comfort.

Jan 30, 2012
Her Journey
by: Anonymous

Don't think of her as gone away --
her journey's just begun,
life holds so many facets --
this earth is only one.

Just think of her as resting
from the sorrows and the tears
in a place of warmth and comfort
where there are no days and years.

Think how she must be wishing
that we could know today
how nothing but our sadness
can really pass away.

And think of her as living
in the hearts of those she touched --
for nothing loved is ever lost --
and she was loved so much.
E. Brennemam

To express
sincere sympathy
in your sorrow


Feb 11, 2011
Chosen Path
by: Anonymous

It's only been a month, I have been told it may take years before I can think of my son who completed suicide on Sept 20,2010 at the age of 36yrs. old and smile instead of cry. Suicide leaves many unanswered questions and much pain or guilt. Since my sons death the only thing I have come to realize is that it was not my fault, depression sets in and they see no other way out of the pain, they feel they just want it gone no matter how.

It's hard to understand because I've never been in that dark hole where my son was and I never want to be there, the pain, sadness and empty hole his death has left in our family is beyond what I could describe. I would not want to put my family through this again. You just have to believe that our loved ones are at peace now. I'm not familiar with Buddhism, however as a Christian some believe our loved ones are in Heaven with Jesus, and some believe they just taking a dirt nap until Christ returns to redeem his people. I believe my son is in peace now no matter what the case maybe. This is hard journey to take. You can only take one day at a time. My thoughts are with you.

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