MY SON, MY HERO,

by TAMMY
(CHICAGO IL)

I WAS AT WORK ON FEBUARY 13, 2013 WHEN I RECIEVED A PHONE CALL THAT CHANGED MY LIFE TO THE WORST FOR EVER... THE CALL THAT TOLD ME MY SON WAS GONE. MY SON WENT TO SLEEP THE NIGHT BEFORE AND NEVER WOKE UP THE NEXT MORNING. MY SON ACCIDENTLY OVER DOSED ON MORPHINE.. HE WAS ONLY 28 YRS OLD. NEVER BEEN MARRIED. NO CHILDREN.. IT HAS BEEN TWO MONTHS NOW AND I FEEL LIKE THE PAIN OF LOOSING MY SON IS GETTING WORST. I CANT THINK ABOUT NOTHING ELSE BUT HIM.. I CRY EVERYDAY. I TALK TO HIM EVERYDAY, ALL DAY LONG. TELLING HIM I MISS HIM AND I LOVE HIM AND THAT IM SORRY FOR LETTING HIM DOWN AND NOT BEING THERE THAT NIGHT OR MORNING FOR HIM.. AS A PARENT YOU PROTECT YOUR CHILDREN AND I FEEL THAT I WASNT THERE TO PROTECT HIM.. I FEEL EMPTY INSIDE. I FEEL HALF OF MY HEART AND SOUL WENT WITH HIM.. EVERY DEATH IS DIFFERENT, LOSING A PARENT, SPOUSE, SISTER, BROTHER, ETC,, IS VERY HARD, BUT TO LOOSE A CHILD IS THE WORST,, NO PARENT SHOULD BURY THEIR CHILD FIRST. WE AS PARENTS HAVE TO LIVE THE REST OF OUR LIVES IN PAIN AND SADDNESS. I DONT UNDERSTAND GODS PLAN FOR ALL THIS BUT ONE THING I DO KNOW IS I HAVE FAITH IN GOD AND I KNOW HE WILL SEE ME THROUGH THIS, MY SON WILL BE LOVED AND MISSED FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE BUT WILL NEVER BE FORGOTTEN... I LOVE YOU MY SON.. WE WILL BE TOGETHER AGAIN ONE DAY.. UNTIL THAN HE IS IN MY HEART AND I KNOW HE IS WITH ME RIGHT BY MY SIDE EVERYDAY.. GOD BLESS ALL OF YOU THAT ARE HURTING. PUT YOUR SORROW INTO THE LORD AND HE DOES HELP. I MEAN I DO HAVE DAYS THAT I CRY ON AND OFF AND THERE ARE DAYS I CRY ALL DAY AND CANT GET OUT OF THE HOUSE.. BUT ITS ONLY BEEN TWO MONTHS AND I KNOW IT WILL GET EASIER, I HAVE FAITH IN JESUS..
I KNOW WHEN I DIED IM GOING UP TO THE SPIRIT IN THE SKY. IM GOING TO THE PLACE THATS THE BEST....

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Oct 01, 2013
Grieving mom
by: Leticia

Tammy, I feel your pain. It's been a year this last Sept that I loss my son. I hold on to The Lord. No one knows the pain of lossing your child. I still cry a lot. It's gotten a little better, but I do have my days that I just cry for him. I am on medication to help me through the pain but it really doesn't help. I just pray a lot and I know I will be with my baby again. He was 37 yrs old shy of being 38 yrs by a week. He was a single father of five and got up that morning and never made it to work. He had a heart attack. I asked god why he didn't take me instead. He had so much to live for. His babies needed there dad. I will never forget that call. I still can't sleep. I wake up and go outside to talk to him and god. To embrace my baby and heal us all. He was my first born. I had three children my daughter and son hurt too. I have to be strong for his babies and support my other two kids. There were very close. We all help with his kids. I pray for everyone of you and also for me to move forward and have this pain in our hearts ease. God bless you. Leticia

May 01, 2013
It does get worse
by: Amber

My brother committed suicide May 29, 2012. It is not almost the year anniversary of his death and I can tell you it does not get any easier. It does get worse as time goes on. Everyone told us it would get easier, but I has been almost a year and I think for me it got worse. I am so sorry for your loss and pray that God be with you along the way. Just know your son is looking over you now and will always be there for you. He walks beside you every day of your life. God bless!

Apr 13, 2013
loss of my brother
by: Anonymous

I lost my brother march 18 2013 he was 50 yrs old went to sleep never woke up I feel lost he wasn't in the same state as me but we spoke and im in such pain he was only 3 yrs older than me I feel like I wished I said, Carlos and now he is gone forever its so hard I cry all day see him in my dreams

Apr 13, 2013
My son , my Hero
by:

It is not easy to lose a Son , keep your head up. take it one day at a time. Pray for him..pray also for your self. know that in the spiritual world you will meet your son again...he will be waiting for you in heaven.

Apr 13, 2013
your son
by: Kate

I am so sorry you have t feel this pain of loss ~you are right about the death of a child being worse. I lost my son in Nov,2012. I understand your feelings.I know them. I took have faith in God to help me cope but it is the hardest path ever I have walked. One day at a time is all we can do. Love to you.

Apr 13, 2013
My Son, My Hero
by: Doreen U.K.

Tammy I am sorry for your loss of your son at such a young age.
I am sure you did everything a mother could do for a child. WE mothers can't be available 24/7 for our children. We have to let them go and live their own lives otherwise we would smother them and they would resent this. We have boundaries and could injure ourselves if we carried the whole load our children have to carry for themselves.
I am glad you know Jesus and you will see your son again. This is our hope.
I lost my husband 11 months ago to cancer and this Hope is what keeps me looking up and hoping that life will get easier. I find that as time goes by I am feeling my grief more. But this may just be normal for me. You will get through this grief one day at a time. Remembering that God only gives us one day at a time.

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