my spouse had double lung transplant then develpoed fungal pnemonia

by sandra lee pirozzi
(toms river,nj)

my husband of thirty years passed away on june 7,2012.he had a double lung transplant on march 27,2012.dr.said he survived the surgery and was out of the woods.then on march 30,2012 he went into cardiac arrest and they had to shock his heart.he came to then he got sepsis renal failure dialysis for days continuous still on breathing machine they put a trach in said it was reversible .developed fungal pneumonia then had blood clots in both arms developed celulitus could not talk cause of the trach we communicated with letter board.we were given false hope for his survival the fungal pneumonia damaged both lower lungs permanently.two and a half months after surgery i was told your husband would be breathless for the rest of his life.he developed a bed sore also all along he had his mind in tact.i told him what the dr. said he said he wanted to come off the life support.he told dr. for three days straight he had to tell every dr. that came into the room the same thing.until june 7,2012 when the dr removed the breathing tube from the trache and the feeding tube from his nose.he lasted two and a half the mean time iam treated for major depression got put in hospital for asthmatic bronchitis on september 28,2012 and was terminated from my job of nineteen years while in the hospital 9/28/2012.i lost my husband of 30 years and my job of 19 years all in three i wonder why i am still in this life.i miss my husband i cannot survive without him he suffered horribly i lived with him in the hospital for 2 and a half months and now i am punished in this life i'm in alone.i wish i were with him.i can't survive.i can't stop crying i need him he is my life

Comments for my spouse had double lung transplant then develpoed fungal pnemonia

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Dec 26, 2012
My spouse had duble lung transplant then developed fungal pneumonia
by: Doreen U.K.

Sandra Lee I am sorry for your loss of your husband of 30yrs. and your loss of job 19yrs. Life often deals us such a cruel blow and if the loss of a husband and job is not bad enough you now have ill health. I can understand that you have had enough. If you don't have quality of life and happiness what is the point of going on in life. FOR WHAT? I am in the same place as you. Lost my husband 8months ago to lung cancer which was incurable, inoperable, rare, and aggressive. I nursed him for over 3yrs. and he developed so many ill health problems. from Shingles in the eye, to pneumonia, to blood clots needing daily injection for over 3 months. then he got a heart attack, numerous hospital visit. NEGLECTED. Treated as a statistic and dismissed from the medical services and sent home to die with NO SUPPORT. He had so much suffering that is adding to my grief. Then my in-laws attacked the grave and me because they could not handle the burial/cremation. If I didn't have a belief in God and this HOPE I wouldn't have got through this terrible time. I was married 44yrs. and to go through life now is cruel. I feel ANGRY. ALL of the storms in my life I leave with God. It is God that goes before me to fight my battles. Some battles we can't fight on our own in our own strength. There are great injustices in Life. We go through MUCH SUFFERING. But losing a HUSBAND and a JOB are two of the biggest HURTS we will have to endure. As I have said many times on this site. God created Life. God takes life back. God created the FAMILY. God set up marriage for COMPANIONSHIP and pro creation. It is God who is going to HELP us through this Life we have left. Otherwise How do we go on in life? This is God's responsibility now to CARE for us. God is also our PROVIDER. Seek God if you have no JOB. Ask God to put the right people your way to help you get another job and Seek God to help you through your illness and to Help you with your Grief. Who else do we Have? Take Comfort in this. May God surround you with Love, Help, Support, And Comfort in your grief and Sorrow.

Dec 24, 2012
I know your pain
by: Anonymous

I am so sorry for your loss. My Charlie died on April 9, 2012.
He had a successful single lung transplant in 2003 so we did have the years that you did not get, but lung transplants don't last forever. On March 15 he fell from a tractor cab and broke his wrist. After surgery he ended up back in the hospital in intensive care. From there on our stories sound similar. Everything that could go wrong did. He was on a ventilator that whole time. They could not get him off. We could barely communicate. His right arm was immobile and there were so many tubes in his left that we could not use a message board. We had hope until almost the end, but he was sedated the last two days. I know he would not have wanted to stay on life support for years, but he did not get to make that decision himself - I had to do it for him. There has been a lot of guilt to get through.
We were married for 45 years, but it is never long enough. Like you, I want only to be with him. The only thing that has kept me from ending it all is my hope that I will be with him someday and that suicide might jeopardize that.
The only thing that has helped me is writing about Charlie and our love and writing to others who have lost everything like we have.
I wish you peace. Julie

Dec 24, 2012
Been there "Still there."
by: Anonymous

My husband passed away Sep and I am lost. In June I passed out and was labled with seziures. The great state Of Oregon took away my right to drive. Altho my test came back nective. The last months of my husbands life was spent unable to take him any where or go any where. And this night mare is still on going. I miss him more everyday. What keeps me going is knowing one day he will hold me again. I will not tell you to be strong but I will tell you one day at a time.

Dec 23, 2012
Feel your pain
by: Lloyd

I know that your pain is so hard I lost my mom that I lived with for 43 years. No brothers sisters are a dad. I took care of my mom for the last 17 years and last 3 on hospice care. Just just passed on nov 27 2012 you have to try to think he would want you to go on and live your life I hated when people told me oh she's in a better place, no more suffing that is true and over time I will know I I'll take heart in that. But remember all the care that you gave him and hold on to the good times. And you do know he is in. Better place and you will see him again hold on to the faith and live for him and your self and tel his story of life. I know how hard it is I feel so alone even in a room full of people. All we have is time and they say time heals all wounds let's pray and try our best uto make our love ones proud your in my prayers

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