My sweet girl, Maddie.
(North Oaks, MN, USA)
Our sweet Maddie, four months ago
I pray that you are at peace, and that your soul is being looked after the way I can no longer look after you in body. I can’t even put into words how much you have meant to me these past 12 years. You have been a loyal, sweet, peaceful companion. I still don’t want to imagine life without you. It hurts to think about you not being there every day when I get home, greeting me with your wagging tail and rushing to the door so you can bask in the sun. I am so happy for you that you got to have a final moment in the sun before you left us, but it also breaks my heart to remember the pain of that moment and the reality setting in for me of what was happening.
In the past 12 years, outside of my family you have been my only true, loyal companion. As I have experienced the heartache of break-ups, rifts between friends, and the ups and downs of school, you have been a constant presence for me. I always felt a sense of peace by just lying on the ground next to you, petting your head and belly, and just enjoying your presence. I know you never understood what was going on in my life, but you were always there for me, excited to see me. You hated it when I cried, and you always found a way to comfort me, just by pressing your face by mine and sniffing my face as the tears came out. You were the one friend who never judged, criticized, or betrayed me in any way. You were loyal the whole way through, and I love you so much for that.
You have always been such a sweet, sweet girl. You deserved so much more than this ending. You deserve to be here still. You were still healthy and vibrant, regardless of your age. You had time left to run, sniff, lay in the sun, and explore outside. You should still be here right now. I have so much anger and sadness inside of me. I am so horribly sorry that we didn’t save you. We should have seen what was happening. The vet should have figured it out earlier and stopped it. The poison that you ate when we weren't looking should have given you symptoms that would have alerted us when we could have still saved you. None of this is fair or right. None of this should have happened to you. I love you so much Maddie. My heart is broken. You are irreplaceable, and I will carry you with me always.
I love you Maddie,