My Wonderful Dad

I lost my Dad suddenly 2 weeks ago from a tragic accident. He was on a ladder high up by the roof painting, and he fell. He hit his head and suffered a brain injury. Less than 8 hours later he was in a coma with irreversible brain damage. He was in Florida and I was in Colorado. I flew down as quickly as possible. When I arrived at the hospital, he was being kept alive with life support. I had to say good-bye, which was the hardest thing I've ever done.

He was 74 and in ok health. I was hoping for at least 10 more years. I feel empty and sad. I cry a lot, and I just feel uncomfortable and stressed, really devastated. He meant so much, as he was always there for me and did so much to be sure I would be happy through the years. He loved me unconditionally, and I don't feel that anymore. It is like my security is gone.

I will miss so many things, but mostly his sweet ways and laughter we shared. We had a lot of really good times and I am sad they are over.

I have attempted to start back to work. It is all overwhelming. The work has piled up. I am looking after my mom and have two teenage sons.I feel as though everyone expects me to bounce right back, and I feel angry at them. I hear "I know how you feel." Each loss is unique and no one truly knows how I feel. They say it is a process, as if there is a date the grief will all be over. I feel lonely, sad, and scared. I do not feel that I can control my depression and numbness. It really just hurts.