by Grace

5 months ago, on August 13, my grandmother, Nana, as I called her, died.

I was only 12, now I'm 13, and it was the very first lost of a family member I have ever experrieced. ( besides my cat, Jake who died October 29 2009. ) Nana had a problem with her kidney. She had to get one removed, I don't know how long ago. Since her death, I tryed so hard to forget about anything that had to do with the reason why she died. But every since her kidney was removed, she spent most of her time in Dialysis. This really hurt me. My cousins, who are both boys ( I am a Girl ) and one is a year older than me, and the other is 2 years older then me, and my sister, who is almost 2 years younger then me, and I were watched everyday after a school for a number of years by our nana, causing all of us to have a super strong bond. During the time nana watched us, we did all sorts of things. But since she started to get dialysis,these things became limited.

Things changed, and I grew up. I became obsessed with boys And friends And celebrities, and didn't want to spend my time with my nana. I became reluctant to even go over her house to visit, and only actually wanted to do somthing with her if it involved shopping. I may be strew hint the truth here, but for most of the time, this was true. I took my nana for granted. I only realized how big of a deal the whole dialysis/kidney thing was until Nana, and my granpa had to move out of state to live with my uncle. They moved December 26, 2011. I said my "goodbyes", and my "I love you"s so many times, by the end the words had no meaning. I went home and cried the whole day. I missed then already, and they only had left that day.

The rest of the year, And the begin of 2012 had its ups and downs. Nana and grandpa both had numerous visits to the hospital, and many other "crazy adventures" as my uncle says. In July of 2012 my father, my sister and I, ( my mother could not go, thanks to work ) drove 20 long hours to see Nana and grandpa. I honestly was little scared of what I would see. I haven't seen Nana or Grandpa since December of 2011, besides through a few failed attempts at Skype. And I was right to be scared. Nana was boney, and hunched over and could hardly walk without someone holding her hand. It was so sad to see her like this. This was not the nana I was used to, at all. But I do remember Nanas first words to my sister and I after we got here.
" oh, it's so good to see you!"
This brought tears to my eyes! I hugged my nana, and never wanted to let go. That nigh I cried myself to sleep.

We stayed of time with Nana and grandpa. But we had to go way to soon. I hugged my nana, and she told me she wanted me to have an "anklet" that she alwaysed use to wear. I Only actually received the anklet last Christmas in a box with a card
Signed Nana. But before we left, I remember saying "I love you soooo much Nana! And don't worry, I'll see you again really really soon!" But that was a lie.

On August 13, not even a month after our last visit, we got the call.
Nana had died in her sleep, with grandpa by bedside. Here was talk of stopping dialysis. I guess they finally did.

I love you nana. And don't worry. I'll see u again soon. <3

Comments for Nana

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Jan 16, 2013
by: Doreen U.K.

Grace I am sorry for your loss of your nana and granddad. You were young and at 13yrs. You are still young. You did what all young people do. You were being a kid and enjoying life to the full. I am sure your nana would have understood this. Your nana wouldn't want you to be around her all day. People need their own space, but also like seeing their grandchildren. Most older people like peace and quiet. I AM NOT ONE OF THEM. I like a lot of chatter and noise and I am 64yrs of age. Don't be too hard on yourself. I bet your nana loving seeing you and looking after you. You loved you with no conditions. UNCONDITIONALLY. Now I am sure you have a lot of your nana's characteristics and you will go on to live as good a life as she lived. You are feeling sad now, but this won't last forever. You will one day Heal from this loss and go on to have your own HISTORY of family and do it all over again to continue the cycle of generations. Just Live Well just like your Nana did. You will make her Proud.

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