by Bren

my mother died when she was on a few days away with her friend. In some ways I get comfort from the fact that she didn't suffer but I/we didn't get a chance to say goodbye.
Happy for Mum but sad for me/us. Does that make sense?
I'm the only boy but at 52 years of age surely I can deal with this. I haven't yet come to terms with it. I can't talk to my sisters and believe I was special to my Mum- not true.

How do I remember her without feeling bitter on her sudden passing? Am I selfish or just weak? I'm married with a wonderful family but there's something missing in my life....

Comments for Nancy

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Jan 26, 2013
by: Doreen U.K.

Bren You are not selfish or weak. You are human and age has nothing to do with how we feel when we lose someone special such as a MOTHER. She nurtured you to become a man. Of course you may have had some difficulties being the only boy. WE are a family of 5 girls and one boy and my brother is distant and feels left out. My brother is such an intelligent and interesting person but he has a different bond with each one. It is just a fact of life. If you feel bitter at all you must have a reason to be bitter. You may benefit from seeing a grief counsellor and explore why you feel the way you do. At least then what has happened won't disturb your happiness with your immediate family. Siblings don't always get on. FACT OF LIFE. Often the parents are responsible for how they reared their children and their parent beforee them and so it goes on. It takes just one person in the family to go into counselling and resolve difficulties from the past and so the unresoved conflicts don't carry on to the succeding generations. They have a better chance to write their own history in how they structure how they want their family to develop.

Jan 25, 2013
by: silver

My husband's mother died the day after Mother's Day in 1977.He had given her flowers and then left Colorado to come to Alabama to see me.(before we were married)He had been here only a few hours when he got the phone call that she had died when he was about halfway here.He was not the only boy (one of 8 kids)but he took it hard.He went back for the funeral then back here.He was depressed and cried a lot over the next few months.I am thankful I was there for support.I'm sure your wife is there for you.He had to support me when my mother died in 2010.He was there for me like I was for him.Don't turn yourself inside to hide.Let your feelings come out somehow.Remember,no one knows or can control how you grieve or how long you grieve.Keep your family love alive and well.That's what helps the most.GOD will send you courage and peace.I send you love and prayers.

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