I lost my husband 10/30/2010 to homicide. I find myself a single mom after over 19 years of marriage. I totally agree this is not a "Happy" New Year. I haven't had the courage yet to even throw away last year's calenders. I put them in my husband's closet. I just couldn't get rid of them. It felt like I was getting rid of him. I spend most days just getting through that day. It's about all the emotional strength I have. I pray daily just to get through today and please help me to not screw up my son. Thanks for letting me jot my thoughts.