nightmare called life

by Donna

It was 3 months ago today, Bryan collapsed in my arms July 23, 2010. It seems like it was just yesterday that my nightmare started, but it also seems like it has been forever. That is the way it was in our lives. It was like we met yesterday but also like we have been together all of our lives.

I am so blessed to have had Bryan as such a large powerful part of my life. He completely changed me. When we met I was a very timid, introverted person. I had been told all of my life how ugly I was, and how beautiful my little sister was. But when Bryan came along he showed me that I was the most beautiful person inside and out that he had ever met. My daughter says that we lived the cinderella dream, we found true love, love that lasts forever. We didn't have a lot of money but we had more love than we ever thought could exist.

But now my dream has turned into a nightmare that I will never be able to wake up from. Why did this have to happen to him. He was such a good person, I mean a genuinely good, honest man. Everyone loved him. I don't wish death on anyone, but with all of the mean, evil people in the world today, why take one of the best people I will ever know? When will this nightmare ever end, or will it?

I thank God, my children, all of you guys and of course Bryan for helping me get through this nightmare now called life.

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Oct 28, 2010
3 months and 5 days of pain
by: Ms Mack

I lost the love of my life on the same day as you, around 4:00pm. I relate to our grieving time frame. I read all of the blogs, cry all the time when I'm alone and talk to him in private as though he's still here. I know I need to let go, but evidently I'm not ready and neither are you. Two nights ago he appeared in my dream as though he were really here. Many times in my anguish I ask him why did this happen? I actually believe he answers my questions in music, songs on the radio and I do get many other signs.

Finally, I feel his presence not all the time but once in a while when I'm alone. Regardless, we need to keep trying to hold on to life the best we can. It's not time for us. We are here for a reason and they are gone for a reason. All we can do is give it our best by going on no matter what life is throwing at us. Just know that in the end we will meet again and go back to the love we found and lost. Know that he loves you and take that love you feel as a sign he is still with you in spirit. Hang in there. Ms Mack

Oct 26, 2010
I know your pain
by: Tom


I know your pain and like you told me several weeks ago we must go on. My wife Stacy passed on the same day as your husband. We will always miss them because they were and are a big part of our life. I talk to my wife everyday and pray every night and ask god to please give her a hug and kiss for me and tell her I love her. (we did that every night before we sent to sleep) I wish I could say more but I am in the same time frame as you. I know they will guide us to finish everything they had started and this will help us heal. Please keep posting on here because everyone has helped me so much over the last 3 months.

Oct 25, 2010
it gets better
by: Anonymous

I won't tell you it ever goes away. You'll always miss him. Things wIll happen that you need to discuss with him. However, it will somehow get less painful.

The grandchild my love was so excited over has been born. She is gorgeous and thriving. However, he left this world before she entered. It breaks my heart that she's been robbed of the chance to know him.

We can only make certain that their memory lives on.
Best wishes to you.

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