No clue about anything

by Nancy
(USA)

Mom died 13 weeks ago today. I've never been 13 days without contact in some form w/my mother. It's just Dad & me now. Two strangers living in the same place. Well, I'm trying to stay in the garage apt down below the house to get some space but spending quite a bit of time in the house w/Dad.

Since Mom died, he's screamed & threatened & launched wild accusations & cussed like a sailor @ me. All the normal behavior he had w/Mom is being directed at me.

He wants to move in the widow of his ex-wife's husband because "they" won't let him live alone. He demands I sleep in the house w/him & leave my kittycats alone in the apt. except for brief visits & feedings.

And then there is the etched in stone law that we must go out somewhere every single day of every single week. Even if he should be eating that much food from fast food joints every single day (& his doctor long ago said that was NOT a good idea), going somewhere every single day w/him?? I'm not allowed to go back to school-we have no money for that, don't even bother trying to get any financial aid. And even a part-time job is forbidden because he has to have someone w/him 24/7 ideally.

Maybe I'd be able to handle this better if I was sleeping at all.

Comments for No clue about anything

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Jul 16, 2010
Take Care
by: Anonymous

Hello,

I am so sorry for the loss of your mother but please make sure that you are safe and okay first. I know that you are grieving and I could not determine how old you are by your letter but if you are old enough to leave, I think that would be a great idea. It is so hard to heal from something like this and any stress that is added to you right now will only make that more difficult. Please take care of yourself....

Jul 14, 2010
You poor thing
by: Anonymous

You're grieving, and your stuck with a control freak who is trying to drag you down with the sinking boat(him). It must be so very hard to take care of your own mind and deal with his actions. Which are amplified. You need to take care of your own grief and get away from negative nelly. HH

P.S Shouldn't be a budinski But you will drown emotionally if you stay.

Jul 14, 2010
Loss of mother
by: Anonymous

I am so sorry for the loss of your mother. I know that pain, I lost my mother when I was 15. I had a wonderful father and he helped make the loss easier. I hate to hear that you are having so much trouble with your father. This is a time that you should be pulling together to get through your grief. I am aware that does not always happen just because you're family.

I lost my 27 year old son, Cody Lee Cole on May 21, 2010. At first my daughter was mad at everyone and blaming everyone including herself. She is getting a little better because she went to a therapist. I hope things get better for you soon and if they do not you may want to consider taking control of your own life and letting your father deal with his. I may have been too forward with that advice but I feel so bad for you and the "mama" in me always tries to make things better.

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