No goodbyes.

by Jane Elliot
(Sydney Australia)

I lost my mum almost 1 year ago , she died suddenly, she was 69 I am still so sad, my dad started a relationship 5 months after my mum died he is still so sad so I find it hard to understand how he could do this. I have been so preoccupied by this that my grief has been stalled until now almost a year later now I have to carrying on grieving and take steps backward because I spent a lot of time thinking about my dad and what he was doing to us. I know he is lonely but it wont bring my mum back and I think he went into it too soon. I still feel like it was only yesterday, hoping the future will bring me some peace or acceptance at least because I miss my mum and didnt get to say goodbye and this makes me very sad.

Comments for No goodbyes.

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Apr 22, 2012
thanks sandra
by: Anonymous

Thanks Sandra. the woman he is dating is actually living with him at the moment . and she was a friend of my mums. she was telling everyone around town how much in love with my dad she is and to think that was my mothers friend I think not.. and another thing how could you lay in the bed where my mom died with my father.. the husband of her supposed friend, i think she has a screw loose makes me sick.

Apr 21, 2012
I hear you
by: Sandra (Sydney)

Jane , I lost my mum 11 mths ago and my dad started dating 5 months later. I am so angry and ashamed of him . I don't want him to be alOne forever but what is the rush? My mum would never of even considered seeing or dating anyone. I am just so upset and it has started the grief process all over again . Hang in there , you are not alone !

Jan 16, 2012
by: jane

Your so right Trish you hit the nail on the head, sorry about your Husband hope your ok. Thanks for your comment.

Jan 15, 2012
by: TrishJ

I'm very sorry for your loss and the pain and grief you are suffering. Men and women just don't think alike. I lost my husband 13 months ago and the thought of starting a relationship with some other man is the last thing on my mind.
In late September a former high school class mate of mine lost his wife of 30 years. I sent him a condolence card and gave him my phone number (just in case he wanted to talk with someone who was experiencing the loss of a true love). We met for lunch. The date was exactly two months after his wife passed very suddenly. He was basically hitting on me and told me he couldn't stand the thought of coming home to an empty house every night. TWO MONTHS!! I was still curled up in the fetal position after two months. I couldn't believe what I was hearing.
Men are very needy and I believe they just need someone to take care of them. It doesn't mean he didn't love your mom and doesn't miss her. He may be sorry that he entered into a relationship so quickly. Don't blame him or take it personally. He's just a man. He will always love your mom.
Take care. God Bless.

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