Now she is finally alive.
by Monta Cielava
My mum died after very hard fight with ovarian cancer. It won.
She isn`t by my side since 19. october.
Last days were such an agony! Terrible. I just talk to God ,
standing on my knees and said : Stop this. Please stop this. I can`t take it anymore.
And he really understood me. An that night my mother died. But maybe..became alive. Finally.
She was (no, she is.. I feel her) such a brave, patient, loving and caring person.
And so pretty. She was Ukrainian (I am half latvian, half Ukrainian). I know, she will see her
native land now... and walking by Karpati mountains..
But... it is so hard for me. It is about two weeks since I don`t have her by my side.
She was only 55 years old. She was the only person I really trusted, really loved.
Its so miserable and hard to forget all that pain she felt. And that is the reason I
will be strong. I will keep the promise. I know she wants me to be happy.
All I can say... I will try. This is called true love. Sometimes it hurts like hell, but
this love never ends. And that makes me strong. Yes, and writing. Writing poetry for me
is a message from space.And a gift for my mother. Because she listens... she knows.