One more day

I didn't get a chance to say goodbye, my love was sleeping (forever) when I came home. I went in the kitchen and stayed there thinking if I didn't look again it would somehow change the reality that while I was going thru my day my reason for living had left this earth. I know it was a kind and quiet passing and I am so happy it was that way. But I am so empty. I feel like I am playing someone else each day because I can hardly keep from screaming sometimes I find myself pleading silently - just one more day one more time to hear his voice see the twinkle in his eyes hear his laugh his wonderful laugh but I know what alone in a crowd means now all too well. how do you go on when your heart is broken in pieces I certainly don't know.

Comments for One more day

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Apr 10, 2015
Thank you for heartfelt words of encouragement
by: luci

Dear Doreen,
After reading your message I recognize your pain and how bravely you're working through your grief. I woke up this morning with sadness from missing my father who also died 3 years ago. Feeling in despair, I researched the internet for advice on the stages of dealing with grief. Your message on this website has help me remember I can cope and recover from my loss. Its a lonely time when you feel like nobody understands, my family seem to have moved on; they don't talk anything about him ... therefore neither do I talk to them about him. Its hard to relate to people who don't understand you are still grieving, but I am encouraged by the positive and uplifting outlook you share despite your own grief as you also come to terms with losing your beloved. Thank you!

Feb 15, 2015
One more day
by: Doreen UK

You only get through this Loss ONE DAY AT A TIME. I learned on this site. I nursed my dying husband for over 3yrs. with the worst cancer ever. He died almost 3yrs. ago. There is no pain like this pain of losing a loved one.
I miss ironing his shirts and cooking his meals and massaging his tired body. The simple things like shopping and cooking together. I still miss him, and wonder each day how I got here past all that pain.
Knowing and believing in God is what got me through the dark times of sorrow when I couldn't cope for 6 months. I did nothing. I healed better from nurturing myself back into life. Do as many good things for yourself each day, and build on this till you feel your days get brighter. Make it a new way of life to honor yourself as you grieve. Everyone goes back to their own lives and then the loneliness kicks in, and it feels like it will be this way forever. Thank God the pain does ease. Otherwise it would kill us. You will find yourself get stronger one day at a time. It is still a hard and painful journey and days it will make no sense to be going through life without the one we have lost and loved.
We all feel like you do. "If only we could have one more day." ONE DAY MORE would not be enough. Nursing my dying husband for over 3yrs. made me want to stretch each day and make it last forever. Wishing I could frame each moment in time and hold it forever. Gone too soon, and so very CRUEL to watch the one you love die a slow death and there is nothing you can do to change this or make it better for those left behind to grieve and try to make sense of such pain coursing through one's body and tearing us down. Needing someone to come and pick up up, and heal our wounds of sorrow. For me I found that comfort in God. He carried me through the tough times and gave me my life back in ways that can comfort others going through this hurt and pain of loss. I doubt any pain can compare with the pain of loss and grief. But somehow our tears get less over time, and our heart heals to the degree we can find the strength to go on ONE DAY AT A TIME. The important thing to do is to build yourself up and nurture yourself with good things and make this a new way of life to keep building yourself up when your heart is breaking and you can't go on. Find one more moment to Love yourself back into life. I am sorry for your loss.

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