One year ago
I lost my partner at 34. We lived together and when I woke in the morning I found his lifeless body in our bathroom. I am struggling with the reality that a year has gone by....not sure where the time went. My world changed overnight. I could not go back to our apartment. I am blessed that a dear friend moved my things out for me. I had to leave my job as I was 3 hours away from family and was not able to cope with work.
He was depressed from not having a job and he took scripts that were deadly. It was not suicide it was an escape for him to get high without knowing he had a heart condition that he was unaware of. The paramedics were even shocked to find someone so fit in his state. I knew he was dead when I found him. I have never found a dead person but I just knew. The house was not the same when I woke up...cannot describe it but something was off. Now that 1 year has passed I find myself crying more and more depressed. I feel as if no one really understands my grief from not only losing him but the flashbacks of finding him and working on him. Truly my worst nightmare came true. I do have a doctor I see on a regular basis Nd I highly suggest it to anyone grieving.