Our Jace

by Dad
(Oak Grove, Mississippi)

June 8, 1987 the doctor exclaimed, "It's a boy!" Tears of joy flooded down my cheeks. Twenty three years exactly, June 8, 2010 tears of pain flooded down my cheeks as we listened to our pastor delivery the eulogy of our beloved Jace. The pain is great. I believe that I can feel my soul, it hurts so deep.

I drive to the levee where his Jeep went right down into the water. No one could discern any sign of struggle. No brakes, no sliding, just a path straight down into the water. His heart beat and breathing was regained in ICU for 3 days, but we think God took him on to heaven as the first responders were trying to get him out of his Jeep. It has been speculated that something abnormal caused his accident. Maybe so. I have decided not to speculate or question.

People have been so good to us. People have shared our pain. I knew there was love in this world, I just didn't know how much. Now I know how much love is in this world. I thank God for all of the love.

Grief is overwhelming. My suffering is immense. I am at the mercy of God to deliver me through this valley of the shadow of death. I worry so much for my wife and daughter. Both are spiritually very strong, but I still worry for their hearts. I pray to God Almighty that He too delivers them through this valley. That they will endure and be as close to whole in reasonable time. I pray that we as a family will hold each other close and bond together and grieve together and come through this together.

The wake, church service and the graveside rites were conducted just as Jace would have instructed. We could not have asked for anything more appropriate. Even down to the pallbearers riding in the bed of a truck for the 1000 yard ride to the cemetery. It was so Jace-like. A close friend wore full military uniform. We had seen him always in fatigues, but to see him come into the church dressed in military perfection, it was such an honor.

One of his lifelong friends sang the Carrie Underwood song, "Temporary Home" to perfection. I was worried as I had never heard her sing before. I thought "Uh Oh". Was I wrong. I had never heard the song before. It was such a perfect song. And I seriously doubt Carrie Underwood could have done a better job. I was overwhelmed.

I pray for strength to go forward. I pray for wisdom in dealing with grief. I pray that the love that was so evident during the immediate days before and after the funeral will continue to wrap us for the coming days.

Comments for Our Jace

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Sep 08, 2010
Membership in a Club You'd Never Want to Join
by: Charlotte

I can empathize with you and your family. I lost my youngest daughter on June 19, 2009. It has been over a year and the pain is still overwhelming at times.
Thank God that my Kristi was a born again believer in Christ. She is in Heaven waiting for me to join her.
Stay on the straight path, and God will take care of you. It won't be easy, and you will ache for your son's presence almost daily.
Remember that this is a temporary home, and it won't be that long before you see Jace again.

God bless you and your family,
Charlotte bayouhoneysuckle@aol.com

Aug 18, 2010
For Jace
by: Anonymous

After 11 months since my sons death - I am still searching
web sites for some sort of comfort. Really, there are none.
But just knowing that there others out there who are reaching
out - is in a sense - comforting. We all suffer the same grief.
We are all shocked and dumb founded by it all. I wonder when
the pain will end - and I realize that it really won't. Each week
is a bit better - by that, I mean - I am not crying my brains
out on a daily basis. But - I still cry and mourn regularly.
When I think of approaching the first anniversary of his death,
I wonder how I will survive it. I have tons of votive candles that
I will put in all the windows - just to give memory and
justice to the date. My son, Alex died at age 39 of a massive
heart attack. He and his wife were divorced, and he had their
son for that weekend. It was his sons birthday (my grandson).
Alex died that night on his son's birthday. It will always be hard
to remember the death in relationship to the birthday.
I don't think that my life will ever be the same again. I can't
imagine ever enjoying Xmas or any holiday again. I don't think
that my husband and I will ever be the same again. We are not
on the same page. Our loss is the same - but I don't think the
intensity of it affects him the same. Mothers!

Jul 29, 2010
I am so sorry
by: Anonymous

Dear Fellow Comrade,

This is a rough road we have been asked to travel. I too lost a son and by his choice. He was only 30 years old and it was almost 5 years ago. I don't know your pain, but I grieve along with you in your story, so beautifully written. I am grateful that you have been wrapped in arms of love. I would love to chat with you further should you choose to contact me through my email at: impossiblejoy@yahoo.com. I can share how time changes things. Blessings, Gracie

Jul 23, 2010
Love is present everywhere
by: Anonymous

I pray for you and your family. My 19 year old daughter passed this May and I had a very similar experience with the outpouring of love. Also, everything seemed to just flow. I feel your pain and pray that God helps heal our broken hearts.

Jul 23, 2010
i feel your pain
by: Kay australia

I am intensely sorry for your pain after loosing Jace ...He looks alot like my son..it is so overwhelming, I too lost my son to a motor vehicle accident he was 23, it happened on may 11 2010. It's like a part of you went with them...Just know you are not alone and my prayers and healing are with you xxxxxxx

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