Recently lost my brother

by Debbie
(Knoxville, TN)

A week ago I lost my only brother and sibling to a sudden heart attack. He was such a friendly guy with a wonderful wife who cared for him deeply. My brother and I were caring for an elderly mother of 84. He was taking care of certain things and I was taking care of other things. I feel as though I have been thrown into a mirage of emotions and issues. I have lost my only brother and now I have to take care of my mother whom I feel is not far from being placed in a nursing home. I am being thrown into not being able to grieve for my brother straight into having to deal solely for my mother's needs. I live two hours away from her and my nephew, my brother's son, is an alcoholic and is living with my mom (my mom allowed him to move in without my knowing about it).

I have all this "stuff" to deal with and I don't know where to start. Her family lives close by, but they do not want to deal with my nephew. I cannot ask him to leave because she requires someone to be there 24/7 and I cannot afford in-home care.

Where do I start? I am exhausted mentally and would really like to just bury my head in the sand.

Debbie