My son left after he and some friends from work went to a restaurant to eat, he was 20 yrs old! He was extremely bright! His first job out of high school was Apple an company that says in their employment page you have less than 2 % chance of getting hired! They pick persons that have certain personalities and have a high aptitude in technology! Robert had worked their for 2 1/2 years and was wanting to move into a higher position, it was a virtual position which he finally got 2 wks before he died! He was also a junior at UMKC! He was active in many organizations, he even worked for the senator on her campaign! He left the restaurant that night his phone was down and he used my car because his was in the shop, he also left his wallet at the restaurant! He left and somehow we don't know why he was on a road he never has traveled it was very dark, not many signs, no reflectors, no lights and the road ended where you have a 90% degree angle turn! He didn't see the turn and went straight into some trees and brush land into a pond upside down but the pond was a septum or sewage pond the medical examiner said he drowned in the sewage! He was found 18 days later by some joggers because this was a remote area plus the sewage was surrounded by brush and trees! I buried my beautiful 6 2' good looking super intelligent young man on Aug 26th 2013 ! Can someone tell me how to go on, I just exist I don't live! He had one brother who is 15 and struggling! I can't go in his room, I can't look at pictures and what's weird is I go shopping for a while starting feeling bad come home, work on projects at home and have 3 meltdowns a week! Is this normal some people say they could even go to the grocery store which I do it was hard at first but now I'm okay with it! I'm so broken inside I just want to hear from others who lost their children not counselor and therapist that read a book! I wonder am I still in shock can someone tell me? I was so protective of my kids and worried all the time!!