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RUDE SHOCK

by JOY
(CHICAGO)

I will never forget the 29th of NOV. 2010, That day an arrow was pierced into my heart.
My 21yr old son was shot dead. He just returned from school and was stopped at his father's alley. He was shot by one of the assailants. I have been heartbroken and devastated. Very
hard to believe. Someone hale and hearty, dead within minutes. We live in a wicked world.
Survival of the fittest. My son, a gentle, understanding brilliant and hardworking child cut down
He was very obedient and respectful. I pray to be comforted and at peace soonest.
I wish our young adults are saved from this kind of brutality in future. IT HURTS VERY MUCH

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RUDE SHOCK

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ONE OF THE HORRIBLE DAYS AGAIN
by: JOY

I woke up today very depressed. This is one of the horrible days . Will it continue like this? Can't I be
happy again. I am hotting and it appears intense daily
I am a bit relieved now that I am expressing it .
Thanks for the opportunity this space is giving people
like me.
It is a tough world really.
JOY

A GRADUATION THAT NEVER BE
by: JOY

This week should have been his graduation from college. This is now going to be a posthumous award.
Very painful and touching. My heart bleeds. I pray I go through all these and come out stronger. It is sad and unbearable. God, please see me through.

It SUCKS!! Big Time!
by: Dakota Blues

I am so sorry for your loss!! My daughter took her life 3 years ago. It was shocking. We had no idea. Murder and Suicide is "complicated grief." One day we are clipping along in an seemingly normal routine and then...the bomb explodes.

I have read that murder, because of the ongoing trials and such, keeps the family on edge. The closure is prolonged. I have come to realize that burying my daughter was the "easy" part. Living without her is painfully difficult. Your grief is still really fresh. I thought the 2nd year was harder than the first as the fog lifted.

So many parents bury children. I never knew that. I am amazed how we are not alone. Advise I have received from those who are further along than me is that the pain of living without our beloved children....does NOT go away. And, really why should it? It is our children we are talking about! We will, in due time, learn to manage the pain...one day at a time - and honor our children by living again. Sounds like a tall order, huh?

Be very gentle with yourself. Your son was deeply loved. He will be deeply grieved. We are CALLED to grieve so that we may be comforted!!!

Big Hugs ~

THANKS VERY MUCH
by: JOY

My heartfelt thanks go to all, who have commented thus far on my pain. Your comments has given me some strength and hope. Knowing , I am not alone and life is about ups and downs but the good thing is getting up when you are down, with the help of God and people like you. The struggle continues.
Thank you

So young.......so hard
by: kay

I hear and feel your pain.To lose a child is the most painful heart breaking,life altering thing that can possibly happen.I lost my son suddenly last year he was 23.My heart still aches,my mind cannot accept the fact that I can not hold him in my arms.I instead hold him in my heart my love for him is so strong and only grows each day.It is hard for us to go on living when part of us is silently dying inside....I am thinking of you and feeling your tragic loss. I send you love and healing.xxxx

WHY???
by: TrishJ

Joy~
It's hard enough to lose our loved ones but to have to face the death of a beloved child at someone else's hand, an act of violence, is something I can't even begin to imagine. The fact that someone could hurt your child has to be overwhelming and unbearable.
There are a alot of sick deviant people in this world. You must be asking yourself WHY? I have no answer for that. I live in Chicago and know that just like any big city there are some cruel ugly things going on every day.
You are going to have to allow yourself a lot of time to heal. You're going to want answers. Don't stop until you get them. You have a right to feel very angry.
My son's friend was hit and killed by a drunk driver many years ago. His mother said to me, you raise your child the best way you know how. You love them, support them, encourage them, watch them grow ~ then someone comes along and in a split second ~ through someone elses carelessness and callousness ~ your child is gone. It just doesn't seem fair. It's not fair.
I wish you God's blessings as you try to make sense of this.
PJ

I FEEL YOUR PAIN
by: Anonymous

I can totally relate to what you are saying.....we lost our son on 11/24/10 to an overdose/possible homicide. Some days the pain is still so raw and new.....as if it just happened. Please know that you are not alone...there are many others here who care and sympathize with you. Taking...one breath, one step at a time.

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RUDE SHOCK