September 4th 2011 at 1:00am I lost my mother, best friend & confidant to cancer.

by Laura Duszynski
(Toledo, Ohio)

My mother was diagnosed with 4th stage Renal Cell Carcinoma on June 16th 2011. She went through intense chemotherapy and then it started getting brain metastasis in her brain. We were all mortified! Her wish was to stay home for as long as she could. Hospice came in and helped certain days and my family and I were on shifts taking care of her around the clock. I was there a lot even when it wasn't my turn. I loved my mom so much and I wanted to spend as much time with her as I could. It was so hard seeing my mother go through such an evil ordeal with the cancer. September 2nd we ended up taking my mother to Ebied Hospice center and on September 4th 2011 at 1:00am she lost her battle with the cancer. I feel so alone at times and all i want is to talk to her about my day like I did everyday. I think Im in an anger and depression stage and I dont want to do anything. Its such a chore to even clean my house at times. Im going to be getting counseling in a few days. I feel that I should be getting over it, but I have to remember its only been 7 months and its not everyday you loose your mother. I really try to keep positive and tell myself that she is not in any pain or suffering anymore, but sometimes my mourning of her gets the best of me. I have also lost a sister in 2004 and my father passed when I was 9 yrs old. I feel like I'm an orphan, there's no other way to describe the feeling. People say that when there is a loss of a close family member or parent it will bring the other losses to the surface as well. I will be the first to say that it is a true statement, but my mother is definately been the hardest to deal with thus far! I also believe that the stress of watching her through her sickness and also watching her pass away in front of us will take me quite a while to heal from. To all of you reading this and those with similar posts I'm very sorry for your loss and God doesn't give us anything we can't handle as long as we let him help us. Also to all Hospice angels Thank you for everything you have done to help our loved one's and our families. You are true angels from heaven and I personally want to thank you for all of the wonderful care you bestowed upon our mother and us as a family as well.
In remembrance of my loving mother who I miss so dearly! Thank you for all of the wonderful memories and your love.

Comments for September 4th 2011 at 1:00am I lost my mother, best friend & confidant to cancer.

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Apr 29, 2012
You aren't alone
by: sarah

Remember that no matter what you are feeling in terms of loneliness, you're not alone, I lost my friend in a car accident on 5/7/2011 and it has not been easy, my adoptive mom (shes the only mother that I've known since I was born) is very sick and as of last summer has a year to live. I am very scared, and losing my friend in that accident was horrible, especially since she got me through school. I dealt with bullying a lot so if it wasn't for her I would not have made it out. As for my mother, I was adopted and just started communicating with my birth mom through facebook. And my adoptive mom, divorced my adoptive dad, and lives in florida now. So I don't see her much. But if you're religious,, I recommend a video on youtube by "the skit guys" called "god's chisel" It might not be directly related but it is something that can benefit everyone. It's definitely one of the more serious skits they have but it's worth watching.Its about how when god shapes us into who we were meant to be, it can be very painful. But if you let him, he can help you become the best person you can possibly be. and If you aren't religious keep in mind I don't mean to be pushy and I will accept your decision either way. But whatever you do, don't give up. You can fight through this no matter what it feels like now. And to me it sounds like you are handling it very well. Stay strong and don't give up. If you want to message me you can at anytime at I'll always be willing to help.

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