She was on her way...

by Tim P
(Edmonton AB)

On March 15th 2009, my best friend and my lover, Maegan Janz, was involved in a tragic accident on her way to see me from Bonnyville, and she was pronounced dead on the scene.

It is so vivid, the memory of our last phone call. She called me while driving on the highway towards Edmonton, and said "I am just in Vilna right now, about an hour and 20 minutes away. I love you so much babe, and I miss you!" I said "I love you too, sweetheart, see you soon and drive safe!" (Like I always did) she said "I will babe, I love you, bye."

The next 2 hours were the longest hours of my life. You see, this day was supposed to be special, it was her 21st birthday. I had the entire night planned out for us.. I was waiting by my patio door for her to pull up to my house. And I sat there, and waited.. an hour and a half went by and I started to get somewhat worried but thought to myself, she's fine.. she has driven these highways so many times. 2 hours went by and I had a sudden sick feeling in my stomach, I knew something was wrong. I called her cell phone... over and over and over, until it stopped ringing. I didn't know what to do... I called the police to see if there may have been any accidents on that highway and the officer that answered said yes there had been one. He tried reassuring me that she was re-routed, because the highway was shut down. But I know my baby, if there was any reason at all she was going to be late, I would be the first one she called... and she didn't call me.

The next thing I did, was call her parents to tell them, I have just talked to the police and that she may have been re-routed. But before I was able to continue, her dad stopped me and said "She's gone Tim, Maegan's dead"... I dropped to my knees and started yelling noooo, noooo!! There was no way she was dead! I just talked to her!!!! She was 45 minutes away from me!!! I sat there, and I cried to him for 5 minutes.. telling him how much she means to me, and that she can't be gone. He said to me, she really loved you Tim. I broke down, I am still broken down.

It has been 4 days since this horrific news I received, and my heart is so empty. Words cannot even express the feelings... I can't sleep, I can't eat. My mom and dad and sisters are here for me, they try to comfort me. But no matter what they say, I can't fathom this. Maegan runs through my head constantly, we had so much to do. So many things to experience in life together, and it's all gone now. Suddenly my happy life turned into a life I can hardly live. My mom found this site for me, because she could tell how bad I am hurt. I keep thinking what if? Even though that doesn't matter.. I am so lost right now and it feels like life will never be the same. She was everything to me, my lover my best friend, my everything..