sigh, May has been hard

by Donna
(Texas)

May has been a hard month this this year. The first, he would say the most important days of the year, without him. Mothers day without him started off bad, you see he wasn't here to be the first one to say HAPPY MOTHERS DAY!! But my daughters did make it a special day for me. They bought me a white gold heart locket, part of the eternal heart collection . On the front of the locket are small diamonds which form two hearts with no end. They said they both saw it and didn't even look at anything else. The said that they knew that daddy would get that for me if he was here, daddy would love it. Now all I have to do is find a picture that is good enough to reduce and still be able to see it. Thank you Bryan for my two wonderful, beautiful daughters.

The second important day is my birthday. Again no Bryan to kiss me and tell me HAPPY BIRTHDAY. He would stay up until midnight just so he could be the first one that I saw and the first one that told me happy whatever the special day was.

We would alwas grill on special occasions weather permitting so this year we decided to grill for mothers day and my birthday.
It was so hard to use his grill, it was practically brand new, he had only used it twice before he died. My kids told me that daddy would want me to use it not to let it just sit there and rot. So I found a really good deal on steaks. The only problem is that I have never used a grill before. You see, Bryan and I were the perfect team. I prepared most everything inside then took it outside and Bryan cooked it. He cooked everything to perfection, we on the other hand, had to put the steak on the grill 3 different times before it got done. I'm hoping that with practice and time that I will learn what to do.
I guess that is what it is going to take to get through life without Bryan, practice and time, alot of time. So I go through life one step, one breath, one day at a time. I love you always Bryan until we meet again