silver

When my baby sister died in Nov 2001,I thought that was very hard.I didn't realize how hard it could be then.Dec 4,2009 my father died.On May 29,2010,my friend of 28 yrs died.June 30,2010,my mother died.Ten months later my best friend/soul mate/husband(My second) of 33 yrs died. I lost the 4 most important people in my life within 18 months.I didn't understand(even though I thought I did)how my mother grieved herself to death 7 months after my dad died.(they were married 64 yrs) It has been 15 months since my heart got torn apart and I still can't quit crying.The only thing that has gotten me this far is my faith in GOD.That and the strong will not to have my children go through both parents leaving so close together as mine did.I write poetry. I try to get out of the house but it only helps for a little while. My birthday was in the middle of August and that's when I began to cry everyday again. According to the previous chart I guess I'm in the 3rd stage.I thought I was handling the grief until then. Everyone keeps telling me it will get better.I keep praying for that.So far it's not.I will post my poems if anyone wants.I will continue to pray for strength for me and for others in the same place.

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Sep 04, 2012
grief of many
by: silver

thanks to all for your support. I am beginning professional support on Sept 12. I cried so much this past month that I got acute bronchitis and decided that my health should not suffer so much. The biggest part was that what I wanted for my birthday in August I could not have. That's when I began to lose control again. My children are adults(32-43) and,luckily they help me cope. I know they also grieve but we also share the good times and it helps. All but one have families to help them. The youngest lives with me and it helps a lot. I pray for all of you.I don't know how others feel but as for me,without my faith in GOD I know I would not have made it this far.I know it will get easier, the question is how long until.I will keep in touch. P.S. I posted a poem called BABY ANGELS for those who might wish to read it.

Sep 01, 2012
Silver
by: Doreen U.K.

I am sorry for your loss of sister, dad, friend, mother, husband. You have had to face a multiple loss in such a short space of time that you have not had time to grieve each loss before another one hits you. You need to consider bereavement counselling if you are to make some recovery from this multiple loss. This is such a heavy burden to carry all by yourself. A trained professional would support you in your pain that would make it more bearable. I couldn't cope with such a massive loss. I am finding it hard coping with losing my husband of 44yrs. 4 months ago to a 3yrs battle with cancer. As his caregiver I slowly watched him die and felt so helpless. I prayed for Healing and this did not happen. I was waiting for Steve to recover and then he slowly slipped away. I am still searching for him in the 1st stage of grief. Steve worked all over the world and this country of England for over 40yrs. and it feels as if he has gone off on one of his jobs overseas and he is coming back. I just can't comprehend Steve not being here in the world. This death is got to be the hardest of them all I have experienced from losing my beloved husband. My eldest sister tells me that it does get better in time. But it hurts to hurt all the time. I thought my youngest sister was coping with the loss of her son of 30yrs. dying almost 5 years ago. But she is not coping well. She goes on her own forum for those who have lost a child. She pours her heart out. She is supported. She is having some bad days. She can't cope with the thought of her son dying all alone under a train. She is torn in two. Our grief is the same but also different in its type of death and pain from loss. You have children to look after and this must be hard coping with this and grief from 4 losses so close together. How does one go on to look after children and grieve? I just don't know. Having Faith in God is what sustains us but sometimes it feels as if it is not enough. My health is suffering greatly from grief. My sister tells me God knows the pain of losing his Son Jesus. But God got His Son back after 3 days. Her son is never coming back. She feels that Mary the mother of Jesus will understand better how she feels. How does one even begin to answer this aspect of her grief? I have no words to comfort her, but to sit and listen to her story of utter pain. A painfull soul who struggles to go on each day. As we all do in our own battle with grief. Each person's pain can only be carried by them no matter how much they pour out their hearts cries here. We take this journey alone but also together. May God Comfort us all and sustain us in our Grief till we find Healing from our Loss.

Sep 01, 2012
thank you
by: silver

thank you for your prayers

Sep 01, 2012
child
by: silver

I don't want to even imagine losing a child.I almost did.One of my sons took his dad's death so hard that the following month he contemplated suicide.Luckily,it didn't happen.My heart goes out to you. I have buried 2 grandchildren (4 mos and 2 1/2). that was bad enough.GOD grant you continued strength.

Aug 31, 2012
All those losses!
by: Linda

I feel for you, losing so many loved ones in such a short time. I lost my son four years ago. I was a basketcase for 3 years. His anniversary was two weeks ago, and I realized I am finally able to go on with life again. I still miss him terribly, but I think I am going to be okay. I don't cry everyday, and I don't spend all day wishing I could die. You are in my prayers.

Aug 31, 2012
Silver
by: Anonymous

I will pray for you

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