Six Years

by Shafaz
(Canada)

It's been six years now.
I'm different now.
Older.
I don't miss you.
I never did.
I just pine for that chance
I was never given.

I had it all planned out
too:
I'd introduce you to the
wonderful world of literature,
animation, religion and
insanity. You'd love it.

But then you had to go and
get sick:
two years old-
diagnosed with Down Syndrome-
and a hole in the heart-
not to mention a fever.

Then you die.
I never got the chance
to be an older sister.
I wanted to.
I want to.
So badly.

Honestly, logically I'm glad
you're dead.
It would've been a hard
life for you.
Instead you've been given instant
membership to Paradise. Still-
I want you here.

I want to be able to love you.
To help you.
To show you.
To ...
do everything for you.

It's been six years.
Such a long time,
the chance is gone now.
I won't ever see you again-
won't ever gain those chances.
Until I die.

And even then there's doubt.

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