So many people gone

by Marie

I don't even know how I feel anymore. From June 2010 to May 2012 I have lost 14 people. 5 cousins, 4 aunts, 1 uncle, 1 of my husbands cousins, my husbands very good friend since he was in grade 1. Also 2 very close friends who were so much like family to us. 1 of those close friends was murdered by his brother. These 2 brothers were close and loving to each other. We still cannot imagine what really happened. I keep expecting to lose more people. I am afraid to let down my guard as i don't want to get knocked down again. I have been having dreams that keep waking me up. I dream about all the people I have lost even before these last 2 years. I dream about other people and myself being in strange situations. Just last week I dreamed that one of my sisters died. It woke me up and then I could not remember which sister it was. I thought things were starting to get better and that happened. I don't think anyone wants to listen to me talk about all this anymore. It's very sad and lonely to act like everything is okay when it's not. Well, I'm doing the best I can. I am trying to be happy again although it is very difficult. Thanks to anyone who cares to read this.

Comments for So many people gone

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Sep 10, 2012
so many people
by: silver

I can understand how you feel having gone to 5 funerals in 18months. I can't know how you feel.I too have weird dreams of someone else dying. I think its the suddenness of it all.I hope no one ever says to you that they are tired of hearing about this. I pray it doesn't happen to any of them. It's hard to grasp the feelings of losing so many so close together. I know there are those who have had this happen.The only two things that have helped me so far are my faith in GOD and the fact that I don't want to add my death to the grief my family feels now. I can not be with you in person but I can be with you in spirit and love and you have that. GOD be with you and help you along this very hard road. I am beginning grief counseling the end of this week as I can't seem to quit crying for my family and esp my husband. If this seems right for you,try it. My income is so low that the area mental health center is giving me a low fee. I pray for you,me and others like us.

Sep 10, 2012
God be with you
by: Seun

I pray that the Lord will give you strength to go thru this sorrowful experience I pray that all ypur departed loved ones should continue their homeward journey in the kingdom of God. Remember that departure from this world is a journey we all must take.

Sep 09, 2012
by: paul


Sep 09, 2012
So sorry for all the losses in your life Marie
by: Linn

I do care to read your comment and hope you know that others on this site care for you and that they want you to share your feelings. I pray that life will get back to normal for you and that you learn to smile again. May God richly bless you in that effort.

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