so very sad

by bobbie jo
(monterey tn US)

im a 37 year old woman who just had my first and only child 2 years ago. im an only child and i have a wonderful daddy who by the way had a double lung transplant ! my momma got killed in a car wreck by a drunk drive 25 years ago and i was with her. my grief is getting worse now that ive had a baby seeing how my friends have there mom when shes needed and my son having a wonderful granny. my husband is wonderful but his parents are not good to me or my son at all and i feel my baby is missing out .my daddy is a wonderful pa you couldn't find any better but a girl still needs her momma .i cry every day missing her when i look at my son on what he is missing out on. how do i get through this .

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May 14, 2014
So very sad
by: Doreen UK

Bobbie jo it is a tragedy to have lost your mom so many years ago. A child needs the nurturing of a mother and when this doesn't happen as it should it can leave a VOID in one's young life. it never goes away. It can take the birth of a child to trigger off so many feelings that can be confusing and hard to deal with. I lost my mother 11yrs. ago and wished she was here to comfort me after losing my husband to cancer 2yrs. ago.
It is so sad that your mother-in-law cannot be kind to you and your son and embrace you into her life and act MATURE. I embrace my son's Ex girlfriend and she is like a daughter to me. I always look out for her and she calls me MOM. I can't understand life at times, but know that many people don't get on. I wish I had made a better effort with my daughter-in-law, but we got off on the wrong foot as she came into our lives when my husband was dying of cancer and she gave us more burdens by her not being kind to my son. But If I was given a second chance I would do things differently. Losing my husband caused me to be angry and act out of character. I carried a lot of my husband's emotions and feelings whilst I nursed him for 3yrs.39days with his painful cancer journey.
Your husband must be caught in the middle knowing his mother is wrong to not embrace you. My daughter has issues with her mother-in-law. She is of a different culture. My daughter asked her mother-in-law not to leave plastic bags lying around as her two children could suffocate if they put them over their heads. Instead the mother-in-law interprets this as my daughter doesn't like her. She has to live with her mother-in-law as she lost her husband to cancer 17yrs. ago. Life is so sad. A lot of unnecessary misunderstandings. See if you can make friends with an elderly person and adopt her as a mom. She may love it being included in your life and you would bring her happiness in what may be a lonely life for her. This may not be for you. But just a suggestion. WE all need someone in our lives to make the journey better. I am sorry for your loss.

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