Stage 4 cancer ..... The words i will never forget

by Joanna Owle
(North Carolina)

Hi, my name is Joanna, i am 21 years old. My father was diagnosed with cancer (stage 4) in July of 2013, he passed on on October 15, 2013. I will never forget that day just as i will never forget my father and the love he had for me. He was my best friend, and showed me what it is to be strong , not physically but mentally. His passing, or ot being there is still a new concept for me ( It has only been a few weeks after all). He was an extremely caring, honest , loving, God fearing individual who would never give up because of me. I was his only child. There is no words to describe how i feel. I have to remind myself on a daily basis that he is okay, he is cancer free now and out of pain , and this helps me to cope. I can remember my father looking me in the eyes, with tears in his, saying " Joanna, i am so tired of hurting." I never knew what to say. I just hugged him and cried with him. He is my angel, and will always be . I look forward to the day when i can hug my father agin and tell him face to face " Daddy, i love you."

Comments for Stage 4 cancer ..... The words i will never forget

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Feb 10, 2014
my amazing dad
by: Anonymous

Thank you for sharing your post. I am also 21 years old and I just lost my father to stage 4 Melanoma. He was diagonsed on October 7th of 2013 and he passed away on December 8th of 2013. I am still trying to figure out how to live this new life that I have been given. The way you described your father is just how mine was.. my best friend. I feel like you do, I can not wait till the day that I can hug my amazing dad again.

Dec 03, 2013
Stage 4 Cancer
by: Anonymous

My father died 4 days ago of stage 4 brain cancer. The words stage 4 cancer embeds in my mind. It is very difficult to understand why we didn't have a clue before the cancer got to the stage of being of incurable. Reading so many inspirational messages online has helped me. I cried a lot. Finally, I begin to write about my father. It relieves the pain, because as I wrote, I thought of so many wonderful things about my father.

Nov 09, 2013
losing your dad
by: Nadine

Joanna, I can relate somewhat to what you must be feeling after losing your dad. I lost mine when i was 23, many years ago. My 'pop' as i used to call him was a heavy smoker most of his life. He had emphysema and atheroscierosis (hardening of the arteries). He went into the hospital for a bleeding ulcer and never came out. He had a heart attack (while i was visiting), a week later he had a stroke, and shortly after another stroke which killed him. I know i was thinking of all the things he would miss out on and sometimes i wonder what it would have been like if i could have had him with me all these years. I am sorry for your loss. I hope you can find some peace and comfort in the days ahead knowing you had a good relationship with your dad. I wish you well.

Oct 28, 2013
Stage 4 cancer
by: Anonymous

I'm so sorry for your loss. You are very brave and resourceful to write about your experience on this website.

Oct 28, 2013
Words do not describe how it feels
by: Rodney Smith

I too will never forget the words Stage 4 cancer.

It is a disease that the Good Lord should simply not have created.

My mom died of stage 4 Brain Cancer on Aug 8 2013.

I am told there is a very sad exclusive membership "club" we both now belong to. Others can seek to comfort us, and I know they mean well. However until you have lost a parent you just can not understand the devastation that such a loss causes.

You have made a very good step in reaching out, and your post truly made me cry. Just take it slow and hold on to your trust that you and your dad will one day be together again.


Oct 28, 2013
Stage 4 cancer..... The words I will never forget
by: Doreen UK

Joanna I am sorry for your loss of your father at such a tender age. What your father put into you will take you through life better. Your father did a great job as a father. He did his job well. The only downside is when they die one's loss is HUGE. It takes time to recover from grief if you learn the secret. TAKING ONE DAY AT A TIME.
I lost my husband of 44yrs. 18 months ago to a deadly cancer and was his caregiver for 3yrs.39days and he died of terminal cancer due to working with a deadly substance of Asbestos. Often there is no way back from many cancers. Just the word changes one's life forever. Having a strong Faith I know I will see my husband again but the days are long and lonely when one is grieving. It is what we put into our days and our life that will help us move forward in time. But grief is a process we have to go through and not shove it aside because it is too painful. Crying a lot is good grief and we start to heal better. But grief unfolds as it does. WE can't force it or delay it. It is just there with such pain that we get anxious for it to be over and indulge in better memories. Watching my husband die slowly in a lot of pain was hard and I am happy he is NOT HURTING ANY MORE. Often there are no words to reply to the hurt our loved one's felt so saying nothing but just being with them is enough.

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