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still missing my son

by Pat
(Florida)

It will 3 months on the 20th since my son decided to leave us. The pain is still more then anyone should ever have to endure, the hole in my heart is raw and bleeding. I have so many unanswered questions that will have to wait until my time comes & God answers them for me. I know that my son was very depressed but I find myself asking him WHAT WERE YOU THINKING?? Did you really think this would not affect us your parents, me your mom who gave you life? What about your sisters, your brother and most of all your 3 boys. Did you really think they would forget you?

We miss you so much, we know you are at peace, we know you are with your Heavenly Father, but you left your family broken, our lives have changed forever, our hearts are heavy and for first time in my life I truly know the meaning of that statement. Whether you realize it or not you were truly loved and you are painfully missed. I Love You Son.

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still missing my son

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miss my son more each day
by: maureen

I also lost my son unexpectedly on October 10 of this year. I miss him every minute of every day and love him more every day. My faith was severely tested, what kind of a God would take a 27 year old in the prime of his life? One day I was cleaning way up on a bookcase I found 3 of his baseball caps I took them down and there were angels wings made of feathers stuck to the back of them. Well i got my husband immediately to come see to make sure I had not gone crazy!

There was no other reason to explain this other than it was Alan saying Hi from heaven. I do not doubt my faith any longer. He is in heaven safe with his Grampy and I will see him again someday. I pray to Alan each morning for strength for each day for me. I am so very sorry for the loss of your precious son and can truly say I know exactly how you feel.
Those left behind...
by:

I would like to think that when those that we loved get to heaven that they have all the answers. That everything becomes so clear and defined. First off he knows and knew that you love him. And I know that he is looking down aware of the pain that you go through.

At the time that he decided the pain within was too much. He was not thinking of how this would effect you and your family. He just was in so much pain he could see little else. And nothing that you could have said or done would have changed the helplessness that he felt.

Regret is the poison of life. My best to you in your long grief journey.

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