Still Too Traumatized To Move On
When I was 13, my grandmother passed away while I was spending the night at her house. I called 911 and did everything I could, but it was too late. The amount of guilt I feel for being right there and not being able to save her is overwhelming. I loved her so much. It has been 7 years, but I still have never dealt with my grief because I can't move past the way she died. I so desperately want to talk about my feelings with my mother (who was her daughter), but I can't because I have always tried to be strong for her since it happened, and I know it will be too hard for me to talk about it with her without breaking down. I miss my grandmother so incredibly much, and I feel so sad that all my memories of her are overshadowed by the traumatic event of her death. She was an amazing, strong, beautiful women, and I just hope that one day I will be able to move past what happened and take peace in all the wonderful memories I had with her. However, for the time being I am still in a lot of pain because of what happened. I was at such a young and impressionable age that I worry that I will never be able to fully move on.