Sweet John"s Mom
I have posted here a couple times. Next Monday April 30th ,it will be one year since my son died of angiosarcoma (cancer of the heart).He was sick only 4 weeks, diagnosed April 13th, came and stayed with us for the last eighteen days of his life. The morning he died, I was holding his hand, and you know how they say your life flashes before you, well his life flashed before me, I remember the when I was pregnant the first time he kicked me.I saw him as a small child and many memories of him flashed before me. I could here the death rattle, and he died. I closed his eyes and my life as I knew it changed.
I still cry almost every night and miss him so much it hurts. I guess when you lose a child, no matter how old...you will morn always. Sometimes I wish I would have a near death experience, so I could see him and know he is ok. The sadness just goes on and on.