THE DAY MY HEART BROKE AND DIED

by KELLI
(louisville ky)


JULY 22, 2009- THE WORST DAY OF MY LIFE! ON THIS DAY MY SON CODY BLAKE MCCLELLAN PASSED AWAY FROM CANCER, MENINGITIS AND A WEEK LONG COMA!

It was a normal day, just a monthly check in with the doc. Cody and I were laughing, playing around like always when the doctor who we had seen for 4 years came in with a look that I will never forget. He asked Cody how he was feeling and if had "the rash" long. This rash isn't a rash, it is a sign of cancer. His counts were way down; the leukemia was back.

So I watched the fear come back to him and to me and just cried. We went to the hospital and he never came home again; within a month my son went thru hell, the port they put in ended up giving him fungal meningitis.

We spent his 11th b-day with his friends here; we had cake and pizza. At the time he was in remission and his port was just put in. So we believed everything was gonna be ok. Within a week he stroked and I really don't want to get into that. It was the worst thing at that point to see. I couldn't do anything for him.

He went to ICU where after hours of tests and waiting they brought me, my mom and fiance to a room where they told me had 90% of his brain covered in blood. He stayed in and out of a coma for 2 weeks. The last thing he said to me was "I LOVE YOU MOMMY".

I WATCHED HIM DIE I WAS SLEEPING IN THE BED WITH HIM WHEN I WAS WOKE UP AT 4:45 TO BE TOLD HE HAD PASSED ON. I WENT FROM HAVING MY SON EVERYDAY FOR 11YRS TO NOT HAVING HIM AT ALL. HE WAS NOT JUST MY SON, HE WAS MY EVERYTHING!

Comments for THE DAY MY HEART BROKE AND DIED

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Jul 20, 2010
When our children die before us.
by: Anonymous

My son was diagnosed with stomach cancer, a rare cancer for a 21 year old, on Jan 5, 2010; he died 44 days later. No sign of cancer, just heartburn. I grieve for him daily, watching him suffer the agony that I felt for him, watching him starve before my eyes.

I have no relief from the memories of his active life before this sickness took him from me and his siblings and his Dad. All I know is that this hurt, this weeping and the pain subsides but still I think of him as soon as I wake and think of him when I fall asleep.

Crying daily helps and without God in my life I don't think I will continue to live a life fully as each day pass. I grieve for you and your family of the memories you have and the memories you'll carry forever. Until one day when God decides we all come together again, my prayers are with you.

Mar 01, 2010
God bless your family.
by: LYSI

I'm so sorry for your loss. 3 months ago I lost my beautiful son and that's the most painful thing for a mother. It's really hard living without him because he was alive only one day after I delivered him; but it makes me feel calm to know that he is in a better place and he is with God now and over there is no more pain for him.

They are not here with us but they are angels and one day we will see them again, the only thing that help us is pray a lot cause nothing in the world helps you more than that. God bless your family.

Feb 22, 2010
Girl So Sad
by: Nadine Collins

I can not write a lot, but my only child died on me with Pancreatic Cancer. I pray for you. He left me Thanksgiving day in 2008. To this day I have some bad moments and always have him with me. I see many people that bring my loss to my heart each day--- What you will feel is a road of feelings. Never get over, just get through it. My prayers are with you==

~Hugs Nadine

Feb 21, 2010
TO KELLI FOR CODY
by: Anonymous

DEAR KELLI, THANK YOU FOR SHARING THIS HEARTBREAKING STORY WITH US. IT MUST HAVE TAKEN EVERY OUNCE OF STRENGTH YOU HAVE TO WRITE ABOUT YOUR PRECIOUS SON. GOD BLESS YOU AND PLEASE
ACCEPT MY DEEPEST SYMPATHY. YOUR SON IS AT PEACE IN HIS NEW BODY. HE'S HAPPY AND HEALTHY NOW.

Feb 21, 2010
My heart breaks for you.
by: Pat

I am so very sorry for your loss. I cannot imagine what you must be going through. Losing a child has to be the very worst heartbreak there is. My prayers are with you, praying that the good Lord will give you the strength you need to get through your tragic loss. God bless you!

Pat

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