The death of my true love.

by Larry Thomas
(Somerset, New Jersey)


Daryl and I lived a charmed life. We met while teaching math at the same high school in New Jersey. I was in an unhappy marriage and she in an unhappy relationship.

My marriage ended and her relationship ended. I took her out to dinner to thank her for getting me a side job in my home improvement business.

One thing led to another and we started dating. I told her I was a bad marriage risk, but if we stayed together for 10 years I would marry her.

During the 10 years we found so many things that we loved to share. I was a scuba diver and she got certified so we could dive together. I was an active skiier and she was a novice skiier. I worked with her on many ski trips and she was able to become an expert skiier.

Our next adventure was skydiving. I started jumping at 53 years old and loved it. She got tired of sitting on the ground and went through the course to also become a skydiver.

When we retired from teaching we traveled around the country doing skydive events.

I had finally found the perfect playmate to share my love of adventure.

At the 10 year anniversity of our dating we got married.

The following year she was diagnosed with stage 1 breast cancer. We did the radiation, lumpectomy, chemotherapy, losing her beautiful hair etc. After 6 months of all the treatments, it seemed like we licked the cancer.

We got back to our wonderful life of adventure.
Daryl had never lived in a new house in her life. We decided to buy a new home in an over 55 gated community in New Jersey.

I sold my home and we moved into an apartment while our new home was being built.

4 months ago she had a pain in her neck that would not go away. We had it checked out and found that the breast cancer had come back in her bones and liver. The liver cancer was the fatal one.

We started the chemo routine again until 2 weeks ago when it was not working. The Doctor sad to go home and be with the family and let nature take its course.

Daryl was able to live in our new home for 6 weeks before she passed away on December 21 2010.

My heart is broken as I have lost my wife, my best friend , my playmate, and my true partner in life. I am now in this beautiful home all by myself missing my wife in every way.

Life is not fair to such a wonderful woman.
She wants me to move on in my life but it will take a long time to feel happy and loving again.

It is time to start grieving and get past the pain. I will never forget the wonderful life we had and the true love we shared.

Comments for The death of my true love.

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Dec 26, 2010
Hang in there
by: Ms Mack

Larry,

I am so sorry for your loss. You were a great couple and fortunate to find one another. The sadness you are feeling will take it's toll on your heart. It's still very new and the roller coaster of emotions will come and go out of thin air. Don't fight it; cry, grieve and go through the steps.

I lost the love of my life 5 months ago and I feared the holidays like a plague. Some days are good, some very bad. Go through the stages of grief at your own pace. The sadness can be a killer and you may feel like it never ends.

Its after midnight on Christmas and I made it through the dreaded holiday. One breath, one step one day at a time. Keep writing, pray strong and know we are here for you.

Dec 25, 2010
Please stay and visit us often
by:

Larry,

I plead with you to keep reading on this site and writing what you heart feels. Truthfully without this site I would have lost my mind to grief. There are wonderful people here who have helped me through the darkest of times and cared when others had moved on. If nothing else you need to know the actual stages of grief the ups the downs, much like a roller coaster ride.

The 5 or 7 stages of grief are of no use when it comes to the human broken heart.....Please keep reading/writing and we will hear you always.
HH

Dec 25, 2010
Our True Loves
by: Judith

Larry,
I hope you take the time to read all of the letters from those who have lost a spouse on this website and glean from it some sense of hope in the months to come.

It's not going to be easy but you will find some of the most caring people here and they will be here for you.

The love you and she shared will remain there for you to help during this most devastating time.

And time is your best friend now. One day at a time.

Dec 25, 2010
The Loves of our Lives
by: Pat J

Larry,
I lost my husband three weeks ago. He was waiting for a heart transplant and didn't make it. He was a Jersey boy having lived in New Jersey for his first 30 years prior to our marriage (then the Chicago area). We too had just moved to a new condo three weeks prior to this death. I can't bear to be there without him so I'm staying with my sister and brother-in-law for now.

We grieve so hard because we loved so deeply. Everyone keeps telling me hold on to the beautiful memories but at the stage I'm at those are too painful to think about right now. I don't know what the future holds for me. I'm frightened and alone. Everyone also tells me things will get better with time. So far for me it seems to be getting worse each day, especially today, my first Christmas without him. I'm trying very hard but this does not feel good right now.

I pray for peace for all of us who are grieving this Christmas day. May God bless you through your time of grieving. We're supposed to take one day at time.

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