the greatest gift....

by tom
(west brnch,michigan)

...was my mother. She was diagnosed with dementia in 2002 and I decided it was time for me to take care of her and had her move in with me. She passed away September 13,2013. I was very blessed that the hospice that was helping me the last 5 months of her life were there to let me go back to being her son for the last 2 days of her life.
the 1st month without her was rough. then I started getting back to work( I hadn't worked in 8 years)and getting busy. but I think I was stuffing the emotions and feelings and its been hittin me pretty hard these last 2 days.
she was the most loving, caring, compassionate person I had ever known. I would find it hard to believe there is one single person on this earth that has a negative memory of her.
today, im not stuffing it. I miss her and it hurts.

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Nov 14, 2013
the greatest gift.....
by: Doreen UK

Tom I am sorry for your loss of your special Mom. One of the biggest hurdles to dealing with grief is that we have no guidelines and have to find our way through this by how our emotions act. Work is a good diversion and means of coping with grief, but if you stuff your feelings down and not face grief as it comes you will feel worse. The pain of grief is that much greater. It is unwise to repress one's losses. I did this and had to resolve 40yrs. of repressed feelings and was in counselling for 4yrs. It was very painful but the healing is immense and because I did this I was able to cope better with the loss of my husband to cancer 18 months ago. But in the first 6 months I did nothing. I took to the couch and bathed my sorrows with TV. I then took one or two jobs a day and scaled back when unable to do this and I recovered better. But the secret was to TAKING ONE DAY AT A TIME. I learned this on this site. Another was Nurturing myself each day and found this so healing. Crying is the largest part of grief, so don't stop the crying. Grief unfolds as it does and in time this gets easier. I wish you better days ahead.

Nov 13, 2013
greatest gift
by: christine

Tom, your mom will always be your greatest gift. Now she is Gods precious gift. Always love her and keep her close to you. She is never far away. I lost my mother fourteen years ago and I will always love her and miss her but we will meet again someday. My mother to was loved by everyone and always had a kind word to say. This world was a better place with her and she touched many lives and those lives will never forget her. Trust in God, He will be with you and give you strength. Hold on to your memories. They are very dear to you and they will help you get through this very difficult time. God Bless my friend

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