The Last Son!

by Derrick
(Alabama, birmingham)

When I was 5 two of my brothers was killed together over none sense at a gas station. When I turned seven (maybe seven and a half) my oldest and last brother was killed. Apparently some people broke down the door, shot him, chased him to the bath room where they finished the job by shooting him in the head. They never found out who did it and since that was in 1998 the case now have gone cold. Last but not least My Father. After losing all his boys except me took it toll on him. My mom left him when I was 6 and he turned to heavy and I do mean heavy drinking. He never mistreated me, beat me, or anything like that but I do remember EVERY night all my uncle's and a cup of his friend would get together, light a fire in a barrow, and drink a whole tub lol of E & J. He went in cardiac arrest when I was 12. Now it's just me and my mom. I never had guidance in life so I dropped out of school, don't have a job I also dont get in trouble and I stand clear of all drugs, tobacco, alcohol etc... I feel that I am a failure success wise but honest I think Im slowly getting it together. It's been so hard mentally because growing up with so much death in the family you don't know what happens when you die. You don't know if their in a heaven, spirits that walk among us, or if their really even is a after life, you just don't know! And when your a child any and everything is possible because you haven't experienced the world to be able to tell between fact or fiction. Growing up watching T.v you start to think ghosts really exist then you wonder if their trying to reach out to you and after you grown up unknowingly training your mind to think that they are is hell on your mind. You start feeling as if someone is constantly touching you, you feel as if you never have privacy, and you just start hating them. It have affected every single detail about my life especially my religion. I Have none. I had trained my brain to believe that when you die there is no after life. That once the electricity leaves your brain, you are just a corpse whos body is decaying and what ever reality you have then is your after life. I'm more of the evolution type because it makes more sense then Christianity. But I doing great to be honest, I have overcame it all... THANKS SOOO MUCH FOR TAKING THE TIME TO READ THIS, IT MEANT ALOT TO BE HEARD...I WISH YOU THE BEST LUCK IN LIFE.. GOOD LUCK... Oh yeah a little about me Im 22, African American, live in Alabama and I the last male to survive. It's tough but true success is to live to see a hundred and that's my goal in life.

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Oct 16, 2013
The Last Son!
by: Doreen UK

Derrick I am so sorry for your loss of all your brother's and father. You have had such a tragic upbringing in life with no guidance as you say so you have absorbed life from your environment and this is also a difficulty.
I feel very sad for you. A fine young man with Integrity but still a distorted thinking about life and existence in general. Because you had no guidance.
I had a strong religious background but questioned much and resented having a hand me down religion whilst at the same time not being an unruly daughter by finding fault with my parents for trying to do the right thing by their 6 children. I absorbed the things that I understood. As a young teenager I had an explosion in my life where my life subdued and irritating tried to understand Life and all it stood for. I read a lot of books and I attended Church from a child so I did absorb some good values which became rituals and traditions. But down the years I did have an encounter with God and He became real to me. I have spent 40yrs. of maturity learning and I do believe in an afterlife.
I lost my husband of 44yrs. to cancer 17 months ago. He died a slow painful death. I do believe I will see him again according to God's promise in the Bible through His son Jesus Christ. Jesus says. "I will come back again and receive you to myself that where I am there you will be also." God wants us to be saved and live with Him forever in HEAVEN. But there is a price. We accept HIM as our Lord and Saviour and have a desire to believe in Him and live a righteous life with God dwelling in us and helping us to Live that life because we can't live it on our own. We have a devil in the world and he will tempt us till the day we die. This is our battle in life. I look to God in Prayer to fight my battles and Help me live for Him each Day. I want to go to Heaven, and I want to live again. We all have a Choice and I have made mine. I hope you one day have the chance to see life in a new way that will also bring you HOPE. I am sorry for your life without your brothers. May God Guide you and Lead you to much happiness in Life and give you a Long Life. I enjoyed reading your story, but with much sadness. Best wishes.

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