The Loss of my Angel
by Conor
(Georgia)
On February 6, 2009, I lost the love of my life, Haiden.
I'm 19 years old. My mother passed away when I was 6 and my father was an alcoholic, neglectful, and abusive. My 16-year-old brother and I have since been relocated to a loving foster family that I am very grateful for.
I'm telling you all this to let you know that I am a very messed up person. This is where I met my angel, Haiden. In drug rehab.
We became great friends right away. He's the most beautiful man, inside and out, I've ever known. We began dating, if you could even call it that, on Valentine's Day of 2008.
I was released from rehab 3 months ahead of Haiden. A week after he was released he asked me to move in with him. On my birthday.
We had an amazing relationship. He was everything I looked for in a significant other. He was patient, loving, kind, passionate, honest, and trustworthy. The butterflies didn't cease for months.
He proposed in August. We were planning to be married in January 2009. Due to the passing of Proposition 8 our plans changed. Then the fights began.
I started to get restless. I'm only 18, I thought. Haiden is 21. He has a stable job and a high income. I don't even know what I'm doing for the rest of my life. I loved him, but I wasn't ready to settle down yet. I moved out in early January.
Not even a month later, I received a call from Haiden's father. He overdosed. He was in a coma in a hospital 45 minutes away from where I lived. I made it there in 20 minutes.
Haiden's health deteriorated at a rapid pace. A week after I received the call, on February 6, 2009, at 9:03 PM, Haiden passed.
To see someone you love with your entire heart die before your very eyes, with absolutely nothing you can do to help, is something I can't even put into words. I can't describe the despair, ache, guilt, loneliness, and hopelessness I feel. I will never get over this as long as I live. He was everything, and I can no longer breathe.
--Conor
