The only reason I'm here is gone

by Daddy's baby girl

I don't know where to start,it's all so fresh. My Daddy died May28th 2011, we buried him this past Fri June 3rd.Just the waiting for his burial to take place was absolute torture.He was 91 yrs old had lived a good life,he was a well respected man.He was not unusually ill, a few problems in the last few years but they were kept under pretty good control.He died peacefully just as I had Prayed so hard for.But he's gone and it hurts none the less. My mother died when I was very young,I do not remember her at all.Daddy was all I had to justify my being here on this earth and he is gone. I feel so empty and numb and I 'm sure this is normal but he's gone. My grief is compounded by bad blood in the family.Needless to say there were not a lot of condolences between my siblings and I.What's even worse is that I have 3 of the most disrespectful, ungrateful,children that God ever put here and they did not help a lot. I think I might could deal with daddy's passing easier if I had some real support. I have my best friend and she did come up and spend the week with me and go to the funeral and I love her for all that she did,but it's not the same as having your blood support you.I feel so alone, don't know what to do.I just keep crying.I keep going to the funeral home web site and looking at the video of him and crying.My friend and I sat here for 4 days and not one of these 3 children called to ask Mom how are you,did you sleep well last night, are you ok, do you need anything,can I help.How do I deal with this loss and them at the same time.I simply can not believe they treated me so badly at a time like this.Tonight I said a very long prayer and ask God to take it away and then came to the computer and found this WEbsite.Hope this will help in some way as well.I don't know what made me think of looking for a site like this,I was going on Facebook.LOL.Maybe it's part of God's answer to my prayer.

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