At age 6 or thereabout, I asked Iyemi
“Mama, why do you cry so much?”
“Because I am a woman and mother, she said”
I did not understand and looked every inch confused,
Iyemi shook her head and said, “ you cannot understand
And never will”. But as the years passed, I understood.
Later I asked my father, “why does Iyemi cry so much?’
My father answered “all women cry for no reason, including
You”. I was more confused.
When I grew older, I asked God, “why does my mother cry so much?’
God said:
“when I created your mother, she needed to be special,
I gave her shoulders strong enough to bear
the weight that the world will thrust on her, and
Shoulders soft enough to comfort and cushion the pain of as many
as those who allow her to be who I created her to be.
I gave her strength to give life, strength to endure rejection that often
Comes from Children and siblings.
I gave her strength to go on when the world gang up against her
Strength to stand the pain of watching those who are supposed to
be on her side align with the opposition.
I gave her strength to care for her family inspite of illness and fatigue,
Knees to pray for her loved ones even in the face of their open contempt
I gave her Sensitivity to love her family unconditionally
even when they hurt her deeply.
I gave her strength to endure her husband in all his faults, and to stay
At his side without weakening.
I gave her strength to be the fool when those around her play out
The wisdom of King Solomon.
Finally, I gave her enough tears to shed when abused by
those who are supposed to protect, comfort and sooth her
pains in her very old age.”
“My child” says the Lord, “The beauty of your mother is not in her looks or her hair.
Her beauty lies in her heart which is the window to her soul.
Her wealth is not in beautiful clothes and material possessions but
In her back bended from toiling, her hands cracked from scrubbing,
Washing and cleaning, her feet tired from walking these miles.
Her face wrinkled from pain and worries for
Her children and those she loved”
I hurt so much for the mother I watched for over 40yrs struggled with
The pain of rejection, hatred and open exhibition of animosity by her
own flesh and blood, yes I remember from way back.
I hurt for the mother who was so often ridiculed and blamed
For every wrong choices her tormentors make.
It is more often in her tears and pains more than in her smiles and joy
That Iyemi’s beauty is radiated.
At the end of her journey, God says,
“Well done my child, you have journeyed well , come home and rest”.


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Apr 08, 2013
Hard Life
by: Federico Lambea

all women cry for no reason, including
You”. What kind of answer's is this? Only a stupid or cruel man, could .Sorry, You had a hard life, and your mother too. My best wishes.

Mar 21, 2013
by: Louisa

Thank you Doreen for your comments on my write up in memory of my mother. I have observed in my life's journey so far that pain is one of the benefits of being a mother. To all mothers out there I say God Bless you on this journey of motherhood.

Mar 20, 2013
by: Doreen U.K.

Louisa what a beautiful rendition of the journey of a mother through life. Of all the toils and many sacrifices she makes. The responsibility given to her by God. It is sewn onto her back and she lives out the life she was meant to live bearing the burdens often of the whole family. In life we will be treated unfairly and unjustly and we will be confused at life being upside down and back to front. But this is the way God designed life for us.
If we had an easy journey we would learn nothing. It is in our greatest trials and tribulations that we learn the most. It is here where character is developed in the crucible of God's choosing. We can bark at life or we can humbly go on learning all we can whilst we have time here on earth. We can learn to live right and to live well helping others along the way. Then we can look up and see God smile at us. Oh we will fall down and God may come and pick us up and dust us off and set us on our way. Our journey will never be smooth. It will be full of sorrow and sadness. Happiness, laughter, joy and Love. When our journey is over we can rest in peace knowing we have done all we can to better our life and the lives of other's along the way. Thank you for you post which Blessed me. I am sorry for your loss of your mother..

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