There's always the Grief Corner
No matter what stage of grief we are in, no matter what month it is of their passing ,no matter if we are doing better.. there's always going to be a grief corner in our heads and hearts. We loved them for so long and always will. We just can't deaden ourselves and feel nothing for someone we spent so many real years with.
It's been almost seven months for me and sometimes find myself back at day one feeling lost and wanting him back. Other days I get up and go through the motions and go to the gym or meet friends for lunch or dinner or go by myself. I feed the Kitties and clean house, watch boring TV and then another day comes to try again to make sense of life in general.
And as I see it,it's that way until we can go with God and see our loves again.
I have some physical problems from helping him all those years and I miss him being here to go to the doctor with me and if I have to have surgery he won't be there to comfort me or help me and I will be so lonely for that. When he was healthy 4 years ago and back he always there for me. Remembering hearing the sounds of his footsteps and looking up to see him was so comforting and I knew all was right with my world.
It hurts to know it's all gone and all I can do is hang on for dear life to the memories of our love. I don't want to forget him ever nor can I see pushing him aside for someone else. Tho' I do need to be hugged and told I'm loved and that I'm special.