This is my third xmas without my daughter, Alicia. It has been a very difficult road. Their are days that are better than others but I am better than three yr's ago. I wasn't going to post anything..but I decided to log on and I read a couple new posts. I felt I NEEDED to write something. I do Not have the answers for anyone but I wanted to share how I am coping. Why horrible things happen to us I am not sure- Life simply is not always fair. I wish I could tell you that in the end it will all balance out-make sense. I believe things just happen. No one is trying to punish us-it is just an accident/life. I am doing better this xmas than the last two. I know I will Never get over losing my daughter. She was only 26. I am doing the best I know how. I have come to realize that I Don't make my life any more complicated than need be. If I am Not up to something-I don't do it. I can only hope that my friends and family can understand. I can't worry about everything..I need to take care of myself. I Hope that those of you out there who are going through your first Xmas without your loved one-just know that your pain is real and hopefully with time-it will lighten. We all grieve differently. God Bless All of You at this very difficult time. p.s. Remember we All care and understand this very trying time. Your not Alone here.