Tinu my love, best friend, soul mate and fiance,

by Febe
(Namibia)

In the middle of all wedding preparations, all the final touches, at the peak of all the happiness just when life could not get any better he took the invitation cards to his family and never came back, they said it was a car accident, i think it was the worst form of cruelty, 31 July 2010.

The phone call continues to play in mind every day, "there has been a fatal accident and the driver died on the spot". It still feels unreal, the worst kind of nightmare that you can never awake from. The pain is indescribable as it is so intense that i am no longer sure if i even feel it, as it does not go away and your body just adjusts. A single phone call ended my life in so many ways, my heart is ripped out and everything that goes with it. is it perhaps so wrong to be soo happy? How am i suppose to continue now. It's been 52 days and it does not feel any better, it get worse every day if you ask me.

A couple of weeks ago 30 October 2010 was going to be one of the happiest days in my life and i could not wait, but today i am dreading every day and i wish that day could be deleted from my calender forever. Everyday is a struggle and i know that it's probably only God taking me through each day cos internally i have no strength and no will power.