Too many too soon

by Bridget

First let me start this by saying that I am the youngest of 8 and I was adopted into the family.
My mother died when I was 13.. before I arrived in the family they had lost 3 sons.
My brother died 18 years ago when he was 50.
My dad died 8 years ago at the age of 89
My other brother died 6 years ago at the age of 66
My sister died this Feb at the age of 72
My other sister died a month ago on April 3rd. at the age of 60.
And today my step mother died at the age of 97.

Am I cursed? Is God mad at me?

Comments for Too many too soon

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May 18, 2014
Watching them go
by: Doreen UK

Dear Anonymous,
You have endured a heavy loss of family members, and you need to honour the way you feel however you need to do this. Scream, cry, do whatever works for you. None of us knows how painful grief is till we go through this. for me the worst grief was losing my husband of 44yrs to cancer 2yrs. ago. It has been such a hard and heavy grief, and none of us knows if it will ever end as we keep losing people from our families. Some losses will be worse than others. but all of us on this site knows what this pain is like. It is at times like this that we need to have people support us so that it eases the pain a little. Sometimes we feel we have to be brave for other people so they don't see how fragile we are. But in theory death is just not understood. In reality it is worse than words can ever say. We have good days and bad days and thank God there are only 24hrs in a day and even this feels too long when one is in constant grief. It is more than crushing for anyone to live with so much pain from losing loved ones. Taking ONE DAY AT A TIME is how I have coped till now. It doesn't mean that I feel Healed. I DON'T. The healing process is slow and long. You will get through this learning some strategies that other's have discovered works. Nurturing yourself each day with good pampering is a good foundation to healing from grief. One small way of pouring ointment on our wounds. Being kind to ones self is what is needed. So don't try to be brave and keeping a stiff upper lip. Grief doesn't work like this. You have to feel it. go through it. and feel the pain FROM where your healing comes from. May you have easier days and months ahead with good supportive family and friends and God to lean on, for God is our Healer.

May 17, 2014
Watching them go
by: Anonymous

On Too Many Too Soon
My father was only 56 when he died of a stroke. I feel that we were cheated of many happy years that we should have had together. He never even met my husband or saw my children. My oldest brother died at 56 of a heart attack. Mother died just 8 years ago on March 8. Then just 6 months later my youngest brother was murdered at about 40 years of age. I did grieve for all of them, but that all seems so long ago.

What seems so much more immediate, my husband died just over 2-1/2 years ago after a long and gradual illness. We had been married just over 38 years. I still feel as though a major piece of me was ripped away. My 3 sisters and I are all several states apart in distance, but we talked by phone on a regular basis. It definitely helped me through a very dark time. Now, the oldest sister died on March 8 of this year, the anniversary of our mother's death. The sister who is closest to me in age died just about 3 weeks later on April 1, which was our youngest brother's birthday. Sometimes I feel like screaming out, how much more do I have to deal with? Why can't I be next and get it over with? It feels like losing my husband all over again.

I'm glad I found this site. I've been telling myself to straighten up and get over it and get on with it. Now I'm going to stop being so hard on myself and let the process work. I will remind myself again that death is really just a vehicle anyway, you know. Just a way of getting from here to the other side. We all have to make the journey. It's not my turn yet. But for now I will just have to keep putting one foot in front of the other and wait for it to get easier. I hope it happens soon.

May 16, 2014
I understand
by: Bereaved of many

Dear Bridget, I too have lost many.

My parents, a younger sibling, and just as I was trying to cope I have had serious illnesses.

I do not think you are being punished. I like to believe the Almighty is compassionate and would not inflict suffering. But I do believe when these awful events happen we tend to question more.

Is it possible for you to remember how you have been blessed to have known such love. I know it might not be much consolation now, but some
will never know the wonderful relationships you had.

I hope you manage to `live in the day' which often helps until the wounds heal. The other
comment was about letting evil into your life.

This is not a positve way of looking at things.
Illness and misfortune fall on the just and unjust. Victims are innocent - they have not
necessary caused their suffering.

Wishing you easier days.

Bereaved of many too.

May 15, 2014
Too many too soon
by: Doreen UK

Bridget I am sorry for all the losses of your family too many too soon.
We look at our family and can't even imagine life without them. When you lose one family member you worry for the future wondering, and hoping you won't lose another member of your family. So many people are confused as you are, going through the same spate of losses and wondering WHY?? "When is it going to stop." Feeling unloved by God that you should lose another member from your family. I lost my husband of 44yrs. to cancer 2yrs. ago and was angry with God for taking him away from me at a time of life nearing retirement. I am having to do this alone and can't understand the lack of quality of life without him. One is tempted to think that God is angry with them. When so many things go wrong one is also tempted to think that they are under a curse. God is in CONTROL and God doesn't do anything to hurt us. People do. So does Satan, who fought with Jesus. Satan is the destroyer. Jesus is our Saviour. Jesus would not have gone to the cross for us and gave his life if He wanted to do us harm. God gave Life and God takes it away. FOR HIS REASONS. We can't understand Why? But have to trust God, He is in CONTROL.
Curses do happen, and it does cost heavy losses in families. Someone may have opened a door into Satan's realm and so He thinks he has a STRONGHOLD on families and so causes DEATH, CANCER, and all the ills in the world. I know what curses can do to a family. I also know that God saves and rescues us. Pray to God and ask his intervention in your life and His protection over your family and loved one's so that you don't lose anymore to death. Seek God's comfort and Peace. His understanding and his Control over your life and your family.
WE had so much tragedy in our family. I felt we were under a curse. Evidence showed this. I sought God and the Church for direction and Prayer. I choose God's ways and I understand His Protection from all harm. When bad things happen It is to God I seek his help and deliverance from all harm, danger, and death. IT STILL HURTS to lose large parts of your family. Some of your family members did reach a good age, and you need to see this as a blessing. KNOWING GOD helps us to KNOW HIS WAYS and ACCEPT THEM. God is not the author of confusion. The devil is and God is going to deal with him and destroy DEATH FOREVER.
Hold onto this HOPE. May God Protect you and your family from any more DEATH and give you all HIS COMFORT AND PEACE.

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