Too many traumatic events in two year period

My story begins with watching my mother pass from cancer by myself then waking my father, who suffered from Alzheimer's, and getting him to fully understand what had happened. One week later had to move my father into nursing home. Three weeks later father-in-law entered hospital. I witnessed his passing less than six months later. Had spent all my time going from nursing home, 45 minutes away, to hospital, one and a half hours away, while still working full time. Two months later aunt entered icu. One month after that my father passed. My aunt passed on one year anniversary of mothers death. At this time I was diagnosed with several serious illnesses requiring surgeries and infusions. Had surgery number one for life threatening issue. Had already developed severe anxiety after mothers death. Incidents that followed include molestation by police officers for 4 hours after auto accident and was denied medical treatment for that duration although I was clearly in need of. All surveillance from patrol cars and precinct "disappeared".
Divorce discussions ongoing through all this time. Underwent second surgery for worsening physical illness. Husband was a total narcissist and mentally abusive. Physically abusive later on, choking me three weeks after surgery for neck and hitting and throwing me against bookcase, picking me up and repeating. Lived in hotels and with friends before moving. Searched for new job, high level, stressful. Three months after moving involved in major auto accident-broke several bones including ribs, leg, wrist-4 months in wheelchair. Divorce finalized while still in wheelchair. Husband never came to hospital despite fact I almost died and was on way to see him to work out our agreement. Nine months later still unable to work and in physical therapy. Obvious financial hardships. Had already been in therapy before accident and diagnosed with severe anxiety disorder, post traumatic stress syndrome and OCD. Continue to deal with pain from accident in addition to other ongoing physical illnesses.
So many other issues to deal with relating to these events.
Feel that I've surpassed breaking point and that it is impossible to believe things will get better.
No hope, paralyzed by anxiety and depression, nightmares when not suffering severe insomnia.
Have strong faith in God but I am completely lost and disconnected.
How do I go on from here? How do you put one foot in front of the other?
I miss happiness and hope. Unrelenting pain and sadness overwhelming.

Comments for Too many traumatic events in two year period

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Aug 24, 2014
Keep strong
by: Anonymous

Take one step at a time. Look after yourself, eat frequent regular meals. Get all medical help you can. The difficulties and sadness will pass to make way for better times. Keep strong.

Aug 22, 2014
Too many traumatic events in two year period
by: Doreen UK

Firstly I want to say that your strong Faith in God has sustained you. I have a strong Faith in God but this does not stop me having the adversity we all face in life. Often like yourself it come fast and furious and you can often lose your faith when tribulations go on too long. BUT. God has his hand on the thermostat and he will not allow us to suffer more than we can bear but will make a way for us to escape the tragedies we face. No easy answers. God often is stretching and growing us in Faith from every Test so that we can eventually have a testimony to His goodness, Grace, and protection over us. We live to tell the tale.
Saying this it doesn't mean you can't go into therapy/counselling to help resolve your hurts of the past and help your anxiety, depression, ptsd, and OCD. To enable you to become a more integrated person who is able to handle life and its many problems and still cope. I have been able to go through therapy/counselling and become the person I am happy with and who can cope with life with the Power of God and my Faith. God can turn our tragedies into triumphs. We will keep suffering adversity as long as we live in a fallen world, but we can remember everything through God's filter and recover something positive to help us go on in life. God is in control. He will never leave us or forsake us. Let this be your starting point. Lean harder on God for your support and strength. Best wishes.

Aug 21, 2014
I feel your pain
by: Anonymous

Wow you truly have had a difficult time. My condolences to you for all your loss. Its clearly understandable why you feel numb at this point,its even harder to bear when you feel like there are no answers and you may continually ask why?
Though many of us may not experience exactly the frequency and number of hardships we can relate to some. I know you say your spiritual and thats good, thats where your answers lie, for example Job, he also lost a Lot and at times it was difficult for him to cope too.So you are not exactly alone.
That said its good to also know that God is not the cause of your problems, granted he allows things to happen, but he will certainly give you the strength you need to cope and pretty soon we will soon be rid of these problems -JAMES 1:13.Taking time to learn more about these things as well as God's promises can really help you come off victorious and get back your positive outlook in life, remember everything is only but for a time.

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