True Account of Losing a Spouse
(Riviera Beach, FL)
It's only been not even 3 months since my Tommy died. He was diagnosed with Cancer in 1993 and was told he had a 20% chance of living 5 years. Lo and behold he has been with us until 1/1/13.....almost 20 years.
The cancer called Lipo Sarcoma is relitively rare. His was located on his upper right chest wall.
He suffered through 2 full bouts of radiation, 3 types of chemo and at least 5 surgeries. We made the best of it for the most part living a normal happy life. To be very honest, we did not have the bery best relationship but there was love.
The last surgery was June, 2012 when the Surgical Oncologest told us that the tumor had become necrotic and was dying in the middle. This activity would have pushed it into his heart and lung. The surgeon decided to make a large hole in the tumor so it could move in the other direction and grow outside of his body. This would give him more time. Within weeks, this horrible, odorous mass was outside of his body and growing. My husband was told Hospice would be best in controlling his pain and keeping the area clean with fresh dressings every day. They were wonderful!
By October he was having alot of confusion. Not because of the morphine which was low dose and well controlled but because the cancer had halted blood flow to his brain. My husband could not accept the fact that he was dying and tried to do his usual activities. At times this made life difficult for me because he was falling and needed to stop driving. He ended up in a Hospice facility for 9 days before he went to a Nursing home for 3 weeks. I felt so bad but he was safe, clean and comfortable there and I was able to get a little rest.
I didn't know how hard this would be for me. You know people will stop calling but it's hard and very lonely. Sunday is Easter and I have such wonderful memories. This year I will be alone. I've never cried so much in my life. I just hope my husband has no more suffering and a wonderful afterlife. I really do miss him.