Two Years Today

by jules
(Boonah, Qld, Aust.)

Today (20th November) is the second anniversary of the death of my husband - John.
The time coming up to this has been a lot harder than the first anniversary - maybe also because a lot has happened this month - my closest brother has been diagnosed with bowel cancer, but has blocked carotid arteries, so an operation is very touchy - they may put stents in the carotids first -he will have to wear a colostomy bag for the rest of his life - but that is something a lot of people cope with.
Also in the last two weeks, a long time friend died of cancer -he was only diagnosed three months ago.
But some good has happened, my grandaughter has contacted me for the first time in four years (circumstances with estranged parents) - we are talking on skype all the time - so that is a lovely thing to have happened.
My life at the moment is a real roller coaster - next year I think I will just continue October through till the 1st December - wipe November out all together.
I miss my darling every day - I am trying to live a happy life without him - but at times like this, it is very hard.

Goodbye, my darling love.
jules

Comments for Two Years Today

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Nov 20, 2011
Two Years
by: M Mack

Jules,

I too hate all the anniversaries, holidays, weddings, everything we had together is gone. It's only 14 months and my dread comes monthly as the date I found him approaches. This has taken a profound toll on me, the days before, the night before and the day of. I relive it each month not to mention all the holidays, anniversaries, birthdays.... I know it's not healthy and at least I make it through in one piece.

We all relive that past in one form or another. The heartache surrounding people you love touches you personally. We are good people and since we've been through this, our hearts grew tenfold for all we come in contact with. Although we wil never have our old lives again, we were given something special- our hearts are big, we feel sadness and we want ti help others in their pain.

Use your power of prayer to be strong. It has helped me get past the worst grief. Pass it in to those you love for they too will benefit and come forth with serenity and comfort. I'll keep you in my thoughts and sending hugs for you to grow in strength. We are survivors and that is our gift. (my submit word is SHALOM!)

Nov 20, 2011
One Year For Me
by: TrishJ

Jules~as I am approaching the one year anniversary of my husband's death I feel so lost and stuck in one spot. I don't think I've made much progress. Part of me feels like it just happened last week and part of me feels like it's been 10 years since I've heard his voice.
Everything that has happened since Joe's death has been intensified X 10. It's so hard facing anything without him here. I'm so sorry you hear about the hard time you are having. Our very dear friend who spoke at my husband's eulogy was diagnosed with thyroid cancer several months ago. It just doesn't seem to end. With Joe here I could face anything....even as ill as he was.....he was always there for me.
I anticipate the next year being worse for me as well. From what I've lived the last 6 weeks I don't think December 3rd is going to arrive and "poof" I'll be my old self again. I feel like that's what a lot of people in my life are hoping for. Ain't gonna happen. I'm ready for it.
Take care Jules. God bless. I still believe happiness happens for most people when we least expect it. Hugs.

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