Tysons Dad

by Zanna
(Alberta, Canada)

My son Michael was killed in a hit and run accident October 15, 2011. He was 29 years old. He left behind a son and daughter. The worst part for me is, he was with his cousin and his cousin is not helping with the investigation at all. My son was killed by his own vehicle. I have not heard from my nephew or his mother since the memorial service where they did not speak to me at all either. This is killing me inside. I think I am okay and doing well, and then the next minute I am crying my eyes out. I know that I am still holding onto my grief and not letting go, its hard because there is an investigation and at some point a court case. I feel like I am in limbo. I feel angry sometimes and am sick of hearing people tell me that I need to move on. I cannot at this time and it has only been 6 months. I am raising my grandson, Michaels son and I am terrified of anything happening to him or my daughter. This is not a pain I would wish for anyone to feel. My husband tries to comfort me when I cry, but he doesn't know how to fix it and he hurts for me too, so he tries to avoid things that might make me sad or think about Michael. All I really want is to talk about him, I know that its because I don't want him to be forgotten. Sometimes I feel that everyone has just moved on and I can't right now. I just want this to be over, all this waiting, I want to rent a hotel room for a weekend and just cry the whole time to get the pain out. I love my son and I wish he was here thats all. I just wish he was here.

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May 06, 2012
understanding your pain
by: Cathy

Hi Zanna, so sad to read about your loss no matter how old or young they were, they are still our kids,whenever i read about any child loss my heart hurts very badly , i can actually feel your pain because i know what i went through and it is not over yet i doubt if it will ever be over, the thought of not being able to see them or talk to them again is very painful. I lost my eldest son nearly 7 months ago due to heart attack and it is still a nightmare to me . I too wish i could have him back. God bless you and help you to take one day at a time.

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